Forever & Always
by Fire and Starlight
Summary: Carmen was so used to being alone. Her past and her mental illness makes it hard for her to trust people, but everyone always left her. So she decided to go see her best friend, Lila in Forks, Washington. It was only a visit. A visit where one thing led to another, and she finds out that she is mated to the Volturi Kings.
1. Chapter 1

**This story is going to be a little graphic. It will contain a lot of rape flashbacks-specifically sexual abuse. It will contain after-effects of it, and this story really won't be for the faint of heart.**

**TW/CW: Abuse-Physical, Sexual. Cutting, Social Anxiety**

**Chapter 1:**

Carmen sat across her therapist, lost in thought. This was one of those weekly sessions that she hoped would one day cure the _bitterment, resentment and the aching hole within her as she thought about the monster._ The monster who had managed not only steal her virginity, but made her feel broken, helpless and weak most of all.

The monster named father.

"Here's the important question. How many times have you gotten nightmares?" Dr. Maia Thompson asked, as she pressed her pen to the paperwork.

Carmen pursed her lips at the thought of them. Her crying thinking that her father was there with her in the bed.

Every creak in her apartment thinking that her father was there about to rape her again. Ready to pound into her, ignoring the cry that Carmen gave him because it hurt. He never waited to adjust to his size, only thrusting in, ripping her from the inside out.

Carmen pursed her lips as she thought about lying or telling the truth. _The truth that the Dark scared her, and she can't go to bed without thinking that he would be there. Or the lie-it was getting better, and she had only them twice maybe three times a week._

But as always, Carmen chose the lie. It was a lot easier than to see the pity in their eyes. The judgment because she couldn't fight off him and feeling like she was a freak for being damaged goods.

"I think that wraps up the session. Unless you have any questions or concerns that you have?"

"Nope." With that, Carmen stood up and walked out of her therapist's office. _The voice already whispering things to her like usual. You know the therapist is judging you. She may not show it, but your file says it all. She's probably laughing behind your back thinking you're the most pathetic person._

Carmen quickly got outside, noticing a couple talking to each other. She paid no mind to them, only wantin to go back to her car and head back to her apartment.

_That couple, who's talking to each other. They're thinking that you must be broken for going to therapy. Or maybe your period came early and now you have a huge blood stain in the back of your pants._ Carmen closed her eyes for a second, wishing that the voice in her head would stop, but she knew it wouldn't. It never did.

Carmen managed to get to her car and mentally collected herself before starting the car and leaving. Turning down the radio to the point where she could barely hear it. She didn't want anyone judging her by her choice of music, so she made it low as possible.

Twenty minutes quickly passed, but Carmen got to her apartment. Something that should have taken her ten minutes tops took a little bit longer due to traffic. But she was home. A place where she couldn't get judged.

Carmen came to the kitchen and made herself some of Mom's favorite (Mac and cheese, mashed potatoes and corn).

As she waited for the water to boil, Carmen thought over how much her life sucked after getting out of high school. She could still remember the graduation the monster gave her. How much he was drunk that night, gave her more bruises than normal but the pain that would follow. _No_. She wouldn't remember it.

…

Later, Carmen sat on her couch with the TV blaring in the background, her phone in hand trying to muster up the courage to talk on the phone without feeling ridiculous.

It took a bit, but she was able to muster the courage and dialed the number she knew so well. A friend that she knew so well back in high school, but lost touch quickly afterwards, right after high school.

Lila went to a college that wasn't in Miami and Carmen stayed in Miami getting beaten until her boyfriend at the time showed up a few minutes later, announcing that he forgot his phone and walked in on a half-dressed Carmen with bruises lined on her torso after her father saw her boyfriend in the house and Jack leaving in a hurry.

She didn't know whether she should be grateful for what followed or not; Jack called the police, the police arresting her dad, taking her to the hospital to find the extent of the damage. But how much she was treated like damaged goods afterwards sucked.

She was the pity looks especially in Jack who she broke up with him soon afterwards. She didn't love him as he did to her. She didn't feel the need to kiss him. Didn't had any need to be in a relationship like that, but it was Lila who hooked her up with him.

Sure, Jack was cute. His black hair and his dark brown eyes and his Korean accent was cute, but she didn't see anything romantic about him. Lila was the one that perused her into asking him out to know what the experience of dating was like.

Carmen grimaced as she remembered some of the memories that came with it. Some that she never wanted to face again.

"Quit being so pathetic, Carmen. It's just a phone call," she told herself, her finger about to hit dial. She knew in her head that nothing was ever just one simple thing. A phone call was one of those things that was so easy, yet so challenging.

After a few minutes of trying to muster up the courage, she finally decided too. The phone picked up after a few rings, she heard a sigh on the other heard before the caller said something.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Lila…" Carmen started unsure where to start next.

"Carmen? I thought you forgot about me. It's been what six, seven years since we last saw each other? Ever since I heard that your dad got arrested. I was hoping you'd call me but never did," Lila rambled on, Carmen smiled softly as she heard her friend's familiar voice.

She took a deep breath before interrupting Lila and her rambles,"I was wondering if I could spend time over where you live now. Maybe for a few weeks maybe longer?"

"Of course! I'll text you the address. I live in Washington now, in a small town called Forks but I'll text you the address!" Carmen nodded, forgetting that no one could see her actions, she said okay.

Relieved after having a conversation with Lila, she set the phone down and was now trying to figure out a way to see if her therapist would approve of this.

* * *

**I was hoping to get this story after finishing AHOG first, but things happened. I swear I will get updates to that, before I turn my focus on this story, but stuff happened. If it wasn't clear, Carmen suffers from social anxiety. She describes it as a voice like I do with mine and it tends to overcontrol her thoughts. Carmen is also on the asexual and aromatic spectrum but she isn't quite on the aromantic and asexual spectrum. **

**Let me know what you think of this start, and I'll see you next time and hopefully updates might come out sooner. **


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thanks everyone for reviewing particularly OmNomNom-Mo, Reading In Moonlight, TabbyStar and leward1992. I'm not sure how accurate it is with the mental health and the abuse stuff, but luckily it's fanfic so it's fine. **_

**TW/CW: Abuse-Physical, Sexual. Cutting, Social Anxiety, Drinking **

_**WARNING: THE FIRST PART WILL HAVE A MEMORY OF BEING SEXUALLY ABUSED. **_

_"Where is my little princess?" She heard her father slurred in which Carmen started trembling. She knew not to make any noise. She could still feel last night's pain when her shoulder collided into the wall. Hoping that she would be able to fight back, but not even a 60 pound child against over 150 pound man wouldn't go so well. _

_Carmen heard footsteps near where she was at. She carefully pressed her back against the wall, wincing as pain radiates down her left shoulder. She winced and made a small groan as the wall hit the tender part of the shoulder. _

_She bit her bottom lip until she could taste blood when she realized what she had done. She prayed that her father didn't her, but alas, no such luck. _

_The door creaked open and she saw her daddy's face smiled cruelly at her trembling form. He knelt down to her size and opened his mouth to say something in which Carmen almost gagged at the stench of liquor in his breath. _

_"You have been aaaaa baaad girrrrrllll," Her daddy slurred, his hand grabbing onto Carmen's ankle before dragging her out of the closet_. _Picked her up and threw her on the bed, her head slamming into the headboard. _

_She briefly saw stars, but blinked them away before she saw her daddy was doing; unbuckling his pants, Carmen tried to drag herself away from her daddy's reach but was no use. _

_Daddy was already finished unbuckling his pants and was on her bed, before Carmen had a chance to scoot to the side and get off the bed. He grabbed onto her ankle, and she stared at him with her big, brown round eyes already tearing up as she knew what was about to happen. _

_He positioned his member into her and started thrusting, groaning everytime he moved. She could feel her insides ripping out, and she closed her eyes wishing that her daddy would stop. Wishing that the pain would subside, but never did. _

_After her daddy was done with her, Carmen cried in her bed. Wishing that she could just be in a normal family where people there didn't hit anyone just for doing one slight mistake and would rape her just for his own sick pleasure. _

_She hated this. She hated playing the victim. She had very little memory of her mom, but she knew that she was caring, loving and so was her daddy before she left. Taking the happiness, the love and being complete family with her. _

_That night, she dreamt of three sets of crimson, red eyes whispering loving things to her, half of which she couldn't understand. _

Carmen woke up with a start. Her eyes glancing at the clock which only read 1:30 in the morning. She wanted to cry, but she lost the ability to cry years ago. Ever since that particular night, Carmen been dreaming of three sets of crimson eyes every night until she was no longer in harm's way.

She thought they were real for the first month or so, but she quickly realized they weren't real; a figment of her imagination. A way her mind protected herself manifesting people whispering loving things to her, but they weren't real.

Carmen sighed as it only been a few hours since she managed to fall asleep, but her dreams were never good. They brought back too many bitter memories; most times, she felt paralyzed as she watched herself get raped. Even though she knew it wasn't real, she had had to each herself relive every time. _Sleep Paralysis _they said, when she described that she couldn't move, nor wake up when she had them.

Sighing, Carmen slowly sat up on her bed, wondering what she should do with her time. It was the middle of the night, and she had nothing to do besides ponder on what to tell her therapist. Carmen never knew what to say especially concerning her problems, and what she wanted. It was easier saying she was fine than the truth, and actually focus on other people.

After all, why would anyone want to know about her? The girl who continuously got abused at home, the one who could never voice her thoughts in thinking that she was wrong, and that everything she's done would get judged, the one with little to no close friends despite her being considered popular.

…

Once the clock went noon, Carmen headed out the front door. She managed to find something to do that kept her busy for hours and that was clean her whole apartment from top to bottom. It kept her busy at least, and it was something that she needed to do to pass the time away; the whole time drinking coffee and energy drinks in the process. Her whole body was running on caffeine to help her stay awake, unless she wanted to deal with the many issues she has.

Carmen started driving to her therapist's office swinging by Walgreens to pick up her prescription of her antidepressants on the way out. Seeing, of how she already ran out about a week ago which made her anxiety even worse, and the voice louder than it was before. She still could hear her doctor's warning in her head; the very same day that her dad got imprisoned. It was just the abuse they caught; they performed the rape kit on her which was personally well especially she hated other people seeing her naked; mental heath specialists examing her mental state where they found out that she had pretty severe social anxiety.

_Carmen sat there stiffly in the hospital gown after they wanted her strip of any clothes. She waited in this gown, thinking that everyone who could see her in the room making her seem crazy. The voice still whispering in her head that this was all her fault because she'd been so stupid to get caught, and now she was going to be the hospital's pet for a bit. _

"_Good Evening, Miss Willis. I'm Doctor Field, one of the mental health specialists that's been assigned to your case. How are you today?" _

_Carmen didn't answer, not knowing whether this person was serious or not. She couldn't get a good feel on her and didn't know how the woman was. She was probably thinking that she was a pretty bad case and that she was broken. _

"_I've studied enough abuse cases and I saw countless mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, PTSD etc. I just want you to describe anything you might have while we're on this. It's better to get help now, or it will get worse over the years and could possibly lead you to suicide," Feild explained which Carmen already made up her mind about her. She didn't like her, but nonetheless Carmen explained things. _

"_I have this voice in this head. It always says things that everyone is judging me, that they are thinking I'm pathetic. Before I graduated high school, it took me roughly fifteen minutes just to ask something or most times, I wouldn't say anything. I could barely even walk into a room full of people without thinking that they're staring about me and thinking 'why is she here?'. _

"_Even when teachers called on me, it always caused panic and I felt it even worse. It's something that I never expected; no matter how many times I've rehearsed things in my head the night before, it caused me to even panic. And in some cases, it left me in tears because my mouth couldn't work and I ended up having an attack afterwards." _

_That went on for a while, before the mental health specialist said something about having to get the doctor and explain things to her. Eventually, the doctor and the mental health specialist came back and said something along the lines of, "We think you may have Social Anxiety with how much your symptoms match the symptoms of it, and it's on the extreme side. You have three options really, take medication, go to therapy which we'll already do to help or do both." _

_Talking about her problems sucks especially since she didn't know how the person would react and she'd rather not get judged by her cae, "Medication is fine." _

"_We'll put in a request for antidepressants. Try not to drink caffeine especially since it has been known to worsen anxiety symptoms. If you must, limit to one a day or only in the morning. Any more could possibly have negative effects and would lead you to have worsened symptoms." they told her. _

It wasn't like Carmen really listened to them. She needed to have caffeine in her system. How else would she avoid going to sleep and suffering from nightmares, and sleep paralysis. She knew there were pills out there, but she didn't want to go through the correct dose again, weeks not working until it clicked, and thinking that her doctor must be thinking that Carmen was that pathetic.

She soon arrived to Thompson's office after waiting a while to get her prescription, and now she had to be patient until Thompson was free to see her.

After about thirty minutes of waiting, the secretary told her that Dr. Thompson was ready to see her and she went into her office. She saw her therapist sitting down at her desk and sat down on the couch.

"What seems to be the issue?" Her therapist asked, moving to the chair right in front of Carmen.

"I just wanted to see if I'm allowed to travel. One of my high school friends lives in Forks, Washington and she invited me to stay with her for a while, so I wanted to see if I'd be able to."

"I honestly really don't see why not, unless your planning on staying there for a while."

"I was." Carmen said, silently adding _until Lila gets sick of me. _

"We could try, and I'll see if I could get your file to theirs, and you could still go to therapy every other week since I don't think you need weekly sessions anymore. Do you?"

Carmen nodded her head no, and Thompson smiled, before going on what she'd do in Forks with her still having issues and still on medication didn't help, but Carmen was free to go.

* * *

**I'm going to try to post twice a week maybe once depending where I'm at. What did you think? Drop a review down below!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to leward1992, Reading In Moonlight, GawkyTC and TabbyStar for your reviews! Honestly reviews just keeps inspiration and gets faster updates from me. **

**Chapter 3**

Carmen waited at the SeaTac airport. The rain pounding down on the ground with no end in sight. She texted Lila that she was in Seattle when her plane landed thirty minutes ago.

Carmen was about to give up before she saw her Lila running towards her, with no umbrella. She smiled as Lila almost looked almost as Carmen remembered her. Her Twainese descent friend had shoulder length black hair, curled slightly and was wearing a purple sweater with black leggings and black tennis shoes.

"It's good to see you Carmen," Lila breathed before embracing her which took Carmen a little bit to comprehend before returning her hug. "I can't believe that your here in person."

Carmen laughed before responding, "Neither could I. I just thought you'd pity me like everyone else and you thought I was weak. I was afraid of that."

"I could never hate you. You should know that."

They soon arrived to Lila's car which turned out to be a few blocks away and that Lila forgot where she parked her Toyota. Typical Lila. She never really did have the best short-term memory.

"So what's going on with your life?" Lila asked as she started driving, trying to get on the highway to Forks. "I mean what happened after your dad got imprisoned?"

"I broke up with Jack, a few days after I was released from the hospital. Managed to find an apartment in Jacksonville, got a job at Music and Arts and been living a regular normal life."

"But you and Jack seemed so great together. Which is why I hooked you up with him since he does seem your type."

Carmen smiled as she remembered that fond memory. _Carmen was standing right next to the wall with Lila trying to pursue her in trying to get a guy for their junior prom. _

_"Come on, Carmen. It would be a lot more fun if you asked someone to be your date. I bet you would find Jack interesting. Seeing how he is Korean also," Lila said, gently pulling on Carmen's arm. _

_"Just because he is Korean? Wow, Lila. Way to put race in your mouth. Just because he's also Korean, does not make me automatically interested in him. Besides, you know I'm not interested in anyone." _

_Lila rolled her eyes before continuing on, "Quit being so picky. At least just once and you can thank me later if you're interested in him . Come on, it's Junior year. Soon, we'll be off to college, spreading our wings and when you look back at our high school, you'll regret not knowing what it is like to date someone." _

_"I hate it when you're right." _

_"I know." _

Carmen smiled softly as she remembered that memory. It was a good one and yes, she did have to admit that Lila could be right at times especially when it came to relationships. She opened her mouth and said,

"So how's your life going?"

"Pretty good. I managed to get a degree in journalism, moved around a bit covering the stories before I decided to go to Forks since it's a small town and quiet minus the whole animal attacks around here, but I work at the Police Station."

"Sounds entertaining."

They had small talk for the rest of the car ride. The trip to Forks from Seattle was three hours, and Carmen found herself slowly dozing off around the two hour mark.

…

Carmen rubbed her eyes before she glanced at the window. It wasn't too bad. To be honest, she loved Lila's house more than her apartment and that was saying something.

"Welcome to Forks where it rains everyday. It's nothing special, but it's nice," Lila told her, bringing up Carmen's bags with Carmen following behind her, clutching her bag tightly.

"Yeah. I just don't see why you would want to live on a small town like this. It just doesn't seem you. I honestly imagined you living in Hollywood or something and star in movies."

"After my dad died three months after we graduated, I realized it wasn't the same. He loved traveling, never really settled down. I was the same way which is the main reason why I have a degree in journalism and you know the rest."

Carmen smiled briefly before feeling an odd sensation that she was being watched, but she ignored it. Her feeling being watched wasn't new. It happened before being diagnosed with social anxiety, and still present now with being under medication and all that.

Lila unlocked the door and they stepped inside. She almost wanted to gaps in surprise, but she was surprised.

"That's the kitchen." She pointed to the right before moving her finger to the left, "The living room. Upstairs is the bedroom, the bathroom and down that hallway is the laundry room."

Carmen nodded. She'd figure it out over the coming days. She headed upstairs along with Lila leading her, before she stopped abruptly and said, "That's your room. It's a little bare, but on my day off, we'll head to Port Angeles or Seattle and pick up furniture or something, but for now. An air mattress would do. I have extra pillow and blankets if you need them."

"Thanks Lila...for everything," She whispered.

"No problem. You're my best friend. I'm not that cruel even though we haven't seen each other in _years_." Her voice turned to accusation on the last word, but Carmen still winced as she knew what her friend meant. "I'll leave you to it. I'm in the room right across the hall. I have to be there at 5 so I need to watch some sleep. G' night."

"Night," She responded back.

Carmen sighed before looking at the window. She could have sworn she saw something standing outside watching her. It must have been her eyes playing tricks on her. She looked away and Carmen started to unpack some stuff-grabbing her pajamas and leaving the rest on the hardware floor for tomorrow. It was getting late.

* * *

**Anyone have any ideas who's standing outside watching Carmen? I know who it is, but I'm not telling. I've figured things out for future chapters, but I'm going to try to push out longer chapters because I have stuff planned. Carmen and Lila are basically sisters-different parents but BFF for life. **

**Someone asked how much the kings know about her.**_**The kings don't know anything about her yet. They are only aware that their mate has been born, but they don't know who it is. **_

**Drop a review down and let me know what you think!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight, leward1992, musicluver246, and shippergirlky for reviewing! And yes, Reading In Moonlight you're correct but I won't ruin the upcoming chapters. **

Carmen settled down quite nicely. It took a little bit for her to realize that she needed a coat every time she headed outside. No longer was she able to walk around in a tank-top and shorts too much. She traded those in for sweaters and pants mostly.

Currently, she was driving to the hospital for therapy. Two weeks passed and for some odd reason, her nightmares were kept at bay. There were a few nights that kept Carmen up and Lila coming in after hearing her cry and scream during the night. That was pretty mortifying which Carmen kept apologizing profusely.

She parked the Toyota that Lila was letting her borrow during the day on certain condition: she must pick up and drop off Lila at work which was simple, but Carmen had free reign over it.

She rehearsed the conversation in her head. She didn't want to look like an idiot trying to say something stupid and everyone thought she was pathetic. Carmen was quite tempted to return or stay in the car for who knows how long.

_I can't do this. _Carmen thought to herself. Her thoughts swarming around her head, it felt like her head was about to burst. All of a sudden she couldn't breathe. It felt like her heart was trying to rip out of her chest.

"Why? Why me?" Carmen felt tears and soon, she started crying. "I can't do this. I wish someone would help me." It was like she was back in Spanish class of a sudden.

_"Carmen, why don't you say school?." The teacher, Mr. Field asked. Carmen froze; she glanced over at her notes she had open. It didn't look so complicated, but her mouth wouldn't dare to budge. _

_"I can't," She whispered, hoping that word would help her like it did the day before. But it didn't. _

_"Come on, Mr. Field believes in you. The whole class believes in you… Tell you what, you don't have to say the first two letters." _

_Carmen froze. Her breathing became rapid, and her thoughts were already screaming at her. Everyone is judging you. You're wasting their time, and they'll be laughing at you because it isn't that hard. You're pathetic. _

_She wanted to disappear. Scratch that, she wanted to run away. She couldn't handle the pressure and her flight or fight reaction already kicked in, but she stayed put. Not daring to move without a fear that she was going to get judged and be treated as broken. _

She heard her knock on her window. A short, pixie girl with short dark hair and bronze eyes looked at her with concern. She unrolled the window and the pixie said,

"Are you okay? I saw you crying and wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You're obviously not fine and maybe I could get you help?" The girl sounded so sure, but Carmen didn't know whether the girl was serious or not. There was something off about her.

"I could guess. I'm really sorry for bothering you for this."

"It's fine. I'm Alice," The pixie- Alice said, guiding Carmen into the doors of the hospital. She already felt like she was getting judged silently. Alice led to her to a room without a care in the world.

"Carlisle, you may want to help her," Alice said as soon as she turned the doorknob.

The doctor-_Carlisle_, which was extremely weird to use a Doctor's first name. It was like this girl had no care of no respect especially a form of authority.

"I'm terribly sorry for bothering you, but it's fine. I manage to have another attack which I doubt it would really matter," Carmen explained, rushing through her words. Panic already filling through her anxious thoughts. "It's fine, honestly. I really don't want to bother you or anything especially since you probably has something to do than take care of my problems."

"You're not bothering me. Now what seems to be the issue?" The doctor asked.

Carmen stood there, her thoughts already wondering if that admitting that she had an anxiety attack, the doctor would judge her. He seems like a nice guy, but she never knew. She replied, "It's nothing. Just a small anxiety attack."

"Anything serious about it?"

"Nope… It happens time from time," she replied. "I had a doctors appointment and I guess I overreacted." _At least it was vague. Smile. _Carmen smiled hoping that it looked genuine, but probably looked like an idiot trying to please people. "I should get going… I'm really sorry for taking up your time."

Carmen turned her back and before the door the door closed, she could've sworn that she heard something along the lines of "she is their mate." Or something like that. Maybe it was her paranoia that did it.

…

Carmen waited at the police station waiting for Lila to get out. It was a few minutes past six o'clock and Lila still hadn't shown up. Then again, being on time was never Lila's strong suit.

It was something that Carmen quickly noticed; _being the transfer at a new school in third grade after her mom vanished in the middle of the night, not bothering to leave a note for Carmen. Just up and left, leaving her father in endless rage, but it would be a few months after that when the first bruise showed up. _

_Being the new girl especially going to a primary white school with little to no diversity of classmates; Lila was the first person who showed her kindness and knew what it was like not to feel Asian enough (something that she was later on grateful for). _

_Lila was nice, but it was the sleepovers they usually had during their childhood and throughout high school. Lila's house brought protection and love something that Carmen missed desperately._

_She missed those days, where she easily lied that her daddy was working late and that he couldn't find a babysitter, so she often told Lila to see if she can pick her up. And everytime it was yes, but somehow Lila and her parents were always half an hour to an hour late than what they say. _

She heard the car door open and Lila jumped right in.

"Sorry I'm late, but well I'm pretty sure you don't need to have my excuse? I was tied down at work. I swear it gets a little more ridiculous a bit. I'm a journalist- not a police officer," Lila muttered.

"But you enjoy it," Carmen pointed out. She started the car and drove away, heading towards the direction of home.

"No shit… Anyways, what do you want for dinner tonight?

"I have no idea."

Lila was quiet for a while until she grinned and turned her head towards Carmen, "Ooh. What about pancakes? I've been craving some of them for a while, but I've never really made them especially since there is only 1 of me. But you're here and we might as well have it together like old times."

"Why not? Remember the time when your dad always ended up burning the pancakes because he kept getting distracted by other things? And then literally put a whole bunch of whip cream and syrup on our pancakes? Those were the best… You know I miss him."

"I miss him too, but I think he'd be glad to know that we're back together again. He always did say that we were sisters-_not in blood, but soul_."

"Yup… I'm pretty sure he was right. We are practically sisters."

* * *

**Aww, how sweet. Lila and Carmen are literally so cute together. It's literally one of my favorite scenes to write because I enjoy writing friendship. And we finally got some of the Cullen's in the picture. Don't worry they will be playing a role. We're like roughly a month away from where New Moon happens, so hopefully that will give you a nice time-frameish. Anyways, ****I really hope you liked this chapter and let me know what your thoughts are!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight, leward1992 and **

**hermonine for reviewing! And Reading In Moonlight, I honestly have no idea if Lila would have a mate. And I'm the author. I'll probably figure it out in future chapters.**

**Chapter 5**

Carmen watched Lila make her dad's pancakes. It really made her somewhat feel terrible that it had been years since Lila's dad passed away without her even knowing about it. She was curious how he died, but she didn't want to pry especially since the man was like a second father to her.

"I know this a stupid question, but do you know some people named Carlisle and Alice?" Carmen asked.

"The Cullens?" Lila responded in the middle of flipping pancakes.

"I guess. I kinda met them today. They are really strange though… It's like they're hiding something."

"They do keep to themselves. I have yet to hear them adopt someone else though it does seem like Edward.." Lila noticed her confused look before she clarified, "Their son finally found someone at least according to the gossip."

Carmen grimaced at the mention of found someone. Romance was never on the table for her, not even during high school when all her friends had a partner and she remained single. Even dating Jack wasn't something she was particularly fond of. She couldn't share the feelings that Jack had for her. It was the hardest part of being graymantic was that she was almost always never interested in anyone.

"Okay…" Carmen didn't know what to say next, for which she was grateful for since dinner was about done and she grabbed a few pancakes off the plate nearly burning her fingers in the process.

She watched as Lila drowned her pancakes with syrup before grabbing it and putting it on the side of her pancakes. It was a habit she always done-preferring to rip the pancakes in tiny pieces than eating it whole.

"Do you want to watch a movie or something?" Lila asked while chewing a piece of pancake.

"Sure."

"Alrighty…" Lila disappeared and came back with a movie and waited until the disk loaded before pressing the main menu.

"No. I refuse. You know I hate The Exorcism of Emily Rose," Carmen said.

"Oh come on. It's not that scary."

"One, exorcism. Two, based off a true story and three, you know I hate horror films."

"Just this once," Lila begged in which Carmen agreed.

"Fine." They watched the movie in silence with Carmen clutching the living room's blanket tightly, squeezing her eyes shut when the disturbing scenes came on.

Half an hour went by, and Carmen was starting to relax and she soon found herself dozing off. It always happened whenever she had an anxiety attack so she wasn't worried about it.

…

Carmen stirred from her sleep, letting out a small wince when she heard her arms pop when she stretched her arms.

"Morning sleepy-head," Lila greeted. "Now come on...Get dressed, we're going on a little field trip."

"A little field trip? Wow, are we in elementary again?" Carmen got up from the couch and headed towards upstairs where her room was at to take her pills and to get dressed.

"No, but I want to keep it as a surprise." She heard Lila say before trading her pj's for a white shirt, a red hoodie and dark blue jeans. She took her pills as soon as she grabbed a cup from the bathroom and filled it up with water.

"Ready?" Lila asked, her shoes already on and her car keys in hand.

Carmen nodded, slipping her tennis shoes on and grabbing her phone before heading out the door with Lila in tow.

"So do you want to tell me where we're heading?" Carmen asked as soon as Lila started the car and drove towards the direction of the highway.

"You'll find out when we get there," Lila responded.

They sat in silence for a while before Lila got off the highway and started looking for a place. She parked at the library and Carmen had a confused look on her face.

"I'll be back." Lila shut the door and ran up to the doors of the library. It was only 10 minutes before she came back returning with what it looked like to be two audiobook cds.

"You have your choice-Harry Potter or Pride and Prejudice?"

"Harry Potter."

Lila smiled before putting the disk in and Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone started playing.

They drove around for a few more hours before Lila made a stop at a building and Lila got out of the car and headed towards the trunk of the car which Carmen took it as a sign to get out of the car.

"Where are we?"

"Seattle… Here, you might want this." She handed her a small, black bag that was awfully light and an instrument case which she instantly recognized as her flute that she owned during school. Something that she hadn't seen for seven years now.

"My flute?"

"Yup." Lila shut the trunk door and walked inside the building.

"You do realize I haven't picked up a flute since graduation right? And now you're wanting me to play it?"

Carmen saw her friend nodded and headed inside the theater. Lila headed towards the restroom which Carmen took it as a sign and set down her bag. She opened it and saw dark black clothes in it which meant she should put it on.

Once she changed her clothes, Carmen met up with Lila and headed into the auditorium. She spotted other musicians on the sidelines with a few stage crew helping preparing things. She headed towards there and saw another flute player which she was immediately grateful for.

Carmen found a seat and quickly set up. Feeling the familiar cold metal of the flute, she quickly glance through the music and it instantly felt like high school all over where she spent her time doing the pit for the musicals her school put on every winter.

She blew a few notes- testing it to see if it was in working condition and surprisingly it sounded like it was still in working shape. Carmen had to talk to Lila about that because there was no way her instrument would still be in tune after all these years.

"So you're the new flute player? I'm Mr. Hills, the director of the pit. One of the actors mentioned that you were coming," said the conductor. He looked a little creepy- balding head with a lot of gray strands, dark brown eyes and a cheesy grin on his face.

"Yeah…" Carmen trailed off, unsure what to say. Luckily the conductor didn't press on and started talking to another person. She glanced at the other flute player who was busy looking at her nails, and looked through the music. She smiled as she saw what it was-_Little Shop of Horrors. _A musical she hadn't played since freshman year.

…

After the rehearsal, Carmen waited for Lila to get done with changing and getting her makeup off. Carmen was really glad for the rehearsal, especially since it had been a while; she remembered most of the fingerings, her fingers still slipped up a few times and forgot what the rhythm looked like for a few songs.

Ten minutes passed before Lila appeared, looking a little frazzled.

"Why is my flute still in tune? Shouldn't it be broken with it having to collect dust after all these years?" Carmen asked, immediately once Lila got closer to her.

"After graduation, you handed me your flute and said you'll pick it up later. I meant to hand it to you the next day, but things got chaotic with my dad being diagnosed with cancer and a few months later he...killed himself." Lila paused, taking a deep breath before continuing on, "And than College starting and me moving away to a different state, I still held onto it. Kept putting it in the shop every year."

"Cool."

They got into the car, after putting the stuff in the trunk and headed back home in Forks.

Three hours passed and they finally entered Forks city limit and it was nice seeing the green foliage. Carmen smiled as she saw the familiar houses passed by and she finally found a place where she was in love with. A small, quiet, peaceful town.

Lila stepped on her breaks, skidding before a crash was heard and Carmen saw her eyes flash before her eyes.

Darkness encroached her and she knew no more...

* * *

**A cliffhanger! I'm evil, and now I only need to figure out if I should stick with the orginal plan and kill Lila or what? Drop a review and can we get to 20 reviews? Tell me what you think!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks to TabbyStar, Reading In Moonlight and Guest for reviewing! How are we on chapter 6? If it feels like we're on ten, but I'm so excited for what's to come in future chapters. **

**Chapter 6**

Carmen didn't know how much time passed when she finally managed to render herself into consciousness. But all, Lila knew was something dripping off her face, and a searing amount of pain which she tried to move in the seat.

Wincing in pain, Carmen looked towards Lila, and grimaced. Lila was unconscious, her breathing labored and had a nasty gash on the side of her head. It wasn't the fact that Carmen couldn't get out of the car, or the fact that Lila looked a little okay, it was merely the fact that Lila didn't look like she would make it by the end of the night.

She didn't want to lose Lila. Carmen already lost everything she already love. Her mom left when she was eight for some stupid reason that Carmen still couldn't understand. She didn't want to know where her mother is. She left Carmen to live with the monster who took everything away from her.

Lila was the only person who really actually cared for her. Her family helped healed a bleeding soul, and made her feel something that wasn't simply just bitterness, anger and numbness. They taught her love, that what she was going through wasn't right-and families don't normally do that.

But most of all, they taught Carmen that it was okay to be herself. It's okay to give someone your heart and want what's best for them instead of avoiding people entirely.

She watched as her friend breathed, wondering whether or not someone was going to come and help them, as she was lost in thought.

…

"You'll be okay," someone reassured her. "Your friend is going to be okay." Unfortunately, her vision was much too dark to even tell who it was and she was too far gone for that.

"What about Lila?" Carmen whispered, before closing her eyes once more. She didn't hear the response that followed.

When Carmen woke up, she was surprised to see someone hovering over her that wasn't a nurse, or a doctor. It was a tiny, pixie girl - Alice if she remembered correctly.

"Alice?" Carmen spoke softly, "What are you doing here?"

"I had to visit you. To make sure you're okay. All I saw was a car crash, but I didn't know the extent of it," Alice said, in which she couldn't quite comprehend.

"You-You saw? How? How is that possible?"

"I could see the future based on people's decisions." was all she said.

"Oh...:" Carmen trailed off, unsure what to say before a thought finally formed that had been bugging her, "What happened to Lila? Is she okay?"

"She's in a coma."

_A coma? _Maybe it was her curse for everyone not wanting to be with her. She chased people away, and those who stayed always ended up hurting her in the process.

…

Carmen finally stirred, her brain felt less foggy than it was before. She was still stuck in the hospital bed with an IV drip in her arm. She sat up, wincing as she felt slight pain through her body.

"Ah, Carmen. I'm glad you're awake? How are you feeling?" It was the blonde doctor, the one that she met in the hospital a few days ago-_at least she hoped it was a few days ago_, _Dr. Cullen_ if Lila mentioned correctly.

"Fine… I'm just a little sore and in pain from the crash," Carmen told the doctor.

"That's to be expected. You were lucky compared to your friend."

"What happened to Lila?"

"She's in a coma. She's much worse off than you-brain damage and a concussion," the doctor replied. "We don't know when she'll wake up and how bad the brain damage is until then."

Carmen grimaced before her thoughts finally came up to her. Where would she go? She couldn't go back to Lila's house especially since she couldn't handle being alone and Jacksonville was out of the question, but she still needed to break the lease and put her furniture in the storage.

"Okay…" She heard her stomach rubble and said, "Can I have some food?"

….

Alice came back in her room with a dirty-blonde hair guy in hair, having similar eyes to Alice's bronze eyes. Carmen stared at her, already feeling uncomfortable with their presence. She still didn't know why Alice wanted to come into the room, especially since they only really met each other only once before minus that visit in the hospital.

Suddenly, her uncomfortable and worrying disappeared and was calm in their presence. That was pretty weird especially with her emotions changing like that. _Maybe it was due to the medication? _

"Alice, why do you keep visiting on visiting me? We barely even know each other," Carmen inquired. That was true, and besides, she certainly didn't hope that Alice was pitying her since she was stuck in the hospital or know anything about her past _(since the Cullens just seem a little weird). _

"I just want to check on you especially since you seemed crush after hearing that your friend is in a coma."

"Okay?" Carmen didn't mean for it to sound like a question, but it came out as one. Luckily, none of them didn't seem to notice it.

"And I wanted to invite you to our house tomorrow since you're getting released!" Alice said in an enthusiastic tone as she if she was looking forward to it. Carmen let out a small grimaced as she knew strange house would equal people she didn't know and that they'd certainly judge her for something she'd say. Unfortunately, that meant that she had to come up with different scenarios so that Carmen didn't seem like a fool against other people-_especially strangers. _

"Are you okay?" The guy spoke in a southern accent. "You seem like you'd be having a panic attack or something among the nature."

"I'm fine." That was a lie, but no one ever wanted to hear the truth. _Why would they care about what she thought? If she told the truth, all she would get were pity looks. She hated those even after her father was thrown in prison. Everyone gave them to her, and they didn't care about anything else. Just once she wished that someone wouldn't run away or get hurt when something happens. That would be pretty nice, but she was a curse. _"And besides I don't really know you. I'm not going to share my problems with you." her tone turned cold.

"If you're sure… Four o'clock sharp, okay? I'll text you the address or I could come pick you up," Alice said before disappearing with the guy.

Carmen still didn't know what to think about them. They were pretty strange.

* * *

**I'm sorry if it's short. This chapter ended up going in a different direction than I thought it would and literally refused to be written (which is why it wasn't up last week). There will be another chapter this week to make up for last week. I know it seems lighthearted right now, but I wanted to show someone who's a survivor, but started to heal. I haven't forgot about her past, and I'm revealing more in future chapters. **

**So Lila's in a coma. Honestly, the way I wanted it didn't work out-but I promise Lila is going to wake up. She's literally Carmen's sister and I'm not heartless to leave her in a coma like that. And also, The Cullens isn't going to be considered like a family to her. I haven't figured their relationship out yet-but family relationship wouldn't be one of them. **

**Drop a review and tell me what you think or if you have any ideas, suggest them down below!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight, and ButlerGirlAnime for reviewing! I'm seriously sorry for the slow pacing, but I need to develop the characters. Hopefully, if it all goes well, around chapter 12 or 14, by the latest, the kings and Carmen could meet. **

**WARNING: SELF-HARM WILL BE INVOLVED IN THIS CHAPTER. THIS IS ALSO A CHAPTER THAT IS DARK. **

**Chapter 7**

Carmen was discharged from the hospital at two o'clock. She managed to see Lila for a few minutes, feeling hopeless as she stared at her friend's body. She should have been the driver. She should have been. Maybe Lila would still be conscious and she didn't have to worry.

"I'm sorry," She whispered. Her hand touched Lila's olive face, and removed a piece of a lock of black hair away from her face; all while wishing that Lila would wake up. "Please wake up… You're all I have left." And with that, she turned away from Lila's stiff body and headed out of the hospital.

Lila shivered in her red hoodie that was still stained with blood splatters, when she stepped outside. Rain was pouring down like cats and dogs, so Carmen made a beeline for it.

The good news was, she was in a small town; the bad news, unfortunately, Lila's house was a mile or so away from the hospital making her drenched and possibly catch a small cold afterwards. Unfortunately she didn't know anyone in this small town minus Alice, but she didn't want to bother the person. After all, she was probably busy and why would anyone really care about Carmen's health whatsoever.

After half an hour of shivering and sliding in the cold, damp streets, she managed to reach Lila's home. She took off her shoes and had an unnerving sense that was something or someone was watching her.

It was just like the first night that she felt someone was watching her. Carmen paid no mind to it as she trudged up the stairs and into her room where she found her pajamas still laying on the floor from where she'd left them. She picked them up and headed towards the bathroom, making sure to grab the razor.

Carmen drew the bath water, making it to the point where it wasn't too hot before stripping herself and grabbing the razor, and getting into the tub.

The water soothed her skin before getting the urge to feel the pain and the blood dripping off her skin, freeing herself. _No. _She couldn't do that to herself.

It'd only been 2 years since she'd been clean but she couldn't help herself. She felt the pain as she watched the crimson blood flow from the wound.

_She felt alive. _

_Okay for once in her life. _

It was only in this moment, where it seemed that nothing mattered in the world. She didn't have to worry about anything. She made one more cut before dipped her bleeding harm into the water; she nearly let out a scream as the pain washed over her, but she ignored it.

Pain was the only thing that made her feel stable.

Carmen wasn't okay. She never was okay.

But no one cared.

….

Once Carmen washed up and shaved her legs, she got out the first aid kit from the medicine cabinet. She put antibiotic cream on the wounds before adding in a gauze wrapping.

Carmen looked at the scars that gathered on her naked body. Scars aligned her body with an array of self-harm, whipping that had long faded-but still prominent, and burnings still remained. One particular memory was so fresh in her mind.

_Carmen sat in her room with tears flowing down her cheeks. She was clutching tightly with her legs, wishing that maybe father would be too drunk and forget all about her existence. _

_She was only twelve, and she already felt like a freak. Her classmates already started mocking her for not holding up to what they think and what Asians should act like. She didn't know what the difference was. After all, her father was never willing to talk to her about what it meant to be someone and he was the last one to ask. She couldn't ask her mom since the only she could remember was that she was also Korean and never talked about her Korean experience. _

_She couldn't speak Korean. Her ate more regular normal food than eating rice, and other Korean dishes. She didn't feel like she could call herself someone as Korean, even Asian even._

_She was a freak so she got up from her bed, headed towards the kitchen before grabbing one of the knives that she saw her father used for cutting up meat and slashed it on her wrists, making slow cuts. _

_It hurt a little, but it hurt a lot less than what her father did to her. She washed off the knife and put it back, watching the blood dribble off her arm. Carmen made sure that they were never deep enough- cutting lightly across. _

_Carmen did that for the next few days until Mrs. Ress, her Math teacher, saw the fresh cuts and took her in the hallway where Carmen was forced to pull up her sleeves where she saw the red cuts alongside her arms. _

_Mrs. Ress went red and guided Carmen to the principal and she waited in the principal's office until her father showed up and she knew she was in trouble than the principal was. _

Carmen closed her eyes as she remembered that painful memory. A memory where someone actually cared about what she was doing to herself. She stopped for a few months after what her father did that night until no one cared.

She opened her eyes and dressed herself; taking caution as she might open her fresh cut wounds and rip open some stitches from the accident.

Carmen heard a knock from downstairs. She trudged down the stairs, having no idea what time it was. She opened the door which revealed Alice standing in the doorway.

"Hey…" Carmen started before trailing off, unsure what to say. She should have prepared what she was going to say instead of standing here all awkwardly wondering if Alice knew she was nervous.

"I'm here to pick you up!" Alice enthusiastically said, a smile on her face.

Carmen frowned, "Is it four already?"

"It's three thirty, but it takes a bit and I'd figured I would pick you up since you're still healing from the car accident among other things."

"Oh um... thanks," she murmured which Alice continued to beam. "Give me a few." Carmen ran upstairs to grab a darker sweater that covered her arms pretty well, put her shoes on, grabbed her wallet and phone.

…

They arrived at Alice's house which Alice got out of the car, with Carmen trailing behind her feeling sheepish.

She saw a good chunk of people - lot more than what she was expecting. There was possibly seven people in the room excluding herself and Alice. They were extremely beautiful more than any other model she'd seen, but they honestly just seemed like normal people.

"That's Edward and his girlfriend, Bella. Rosalie and Emmett and you know Carlisle, that's his wife cutting something up and Jasper right next to her," Alice introduced them to her.

They all looked pretty different from each other, minus the eyes where it seemed that everyone had bronze-colored eyes minus the girl sitting next to Edward; she had a dark brown. A shade or two lighter than Carmen's black eyes.

It just felt like Carmen was encroaching in their area. Everyone had a role in this family and she was the only one who was just their. She quickly made her way toward Edward, Bella on the couch and sat across from them.

She occasionally looked at them noticing something more than high school romance. It was something that she envied people in relationships, where both people could get into a relationship and be in love with each other.

Edward just reminded her of a possessive guy who looked to be quite broad in in each Carmen labeled him as an emotional wannabe. He just seemed like it. He glared at her which Carmen shrunken away from the glare. For some odd reason, he seemed to hate her.

She got up from the couch and walked towards Alice who was currently having a conversation with the doctor that treated her while she was in the hospital. She waited there until Carlisle and Alice stopped talking and looked at her.

"Is there somewhere where I could take a nap? I'm feeling pretty tired right now and need a break," Carmen asked before Carlisle nodded.

"I could show you," Carlisle offered in which she nodded.

Carmen followed him upstairs where he led her to a bedroom with a nice bed that looked like it had never been slept on.

"Thanks," she whispered.

He nodded and closed the door behind him and Carmen laid down on the bed, and she instantly fell asleep before her head hit the pillow.

…

"Who is she?" Bella asked. "I thought I was the only one who knows your secret."

"She's the king's mate," Alice told the family. "She doesn't know anything yet… I've seen her come to Forks and I've taken an eye on her."

"It's true… And why do you watch her? She's better not knowing," Edward said. He wasn't a fan of her. Her thoughts were muddled with worry and memories and how much she was jealous since she couldn't have what he and Bella had.

"Regardless, we still should keep an eye on her," Esme said. "Look at the poor dear. She needs help."

They continued chatting about Carmen and why Alice brought her while Carmen slept.

* * *

**I know this chapter wasn't pretty, but I really wanted to show Carmen and her thoughts which took a dark turn. I know how she feels especially since I recently broke my days of being clean all of a sudden. **

**Carmen is still trying to heal and after finding out that Lila, the only person that cares about is in a coma with no idea when she's going to wake up is hard and that sent her spiraling into the dark things. I wanted to show that while people could be okay, but one thing that should be meaningless is stacked can make someone spiral into a dark hole. And how one thing could set someone to go back to what they used to do; in which case self-harm from Carmen. **

**We're getting closer to the kings slowly. There will be some time jumps in chapter 9, but most likely chapter 12 is where the kings and Carmen meets. **

**Tell me what you think in the comments! And if you have any ideas, suggestions anything for that matter just leave them in the comments! **


	8. Chapter 8

_**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight, ButlerGirlAnime, hermonine and KuroShiroNeko-chan for reviewing!**_ **KuroShiroNeko-chan, **_**I apologize for it being strange-but she just got released from the hospital, she's not in the best mental health as shown in chapter 7 and sometimes mental illnesses can make you tired (pretending she's fine/thoughts over-working and brain won't ever shut down etc). Carmen still has nightmares at night, but they are not as bad. She is also stuck in a house where she knows 2 people really and she has no one to talk to without feeling like she's intruding on them. I really hope that helps (I'd definitely suggest looking it up if you need to know more) **_

**Chapter 8 **

Carmen didn't feel refreshed when she woke up from the nap. _Maybe if it was forever or a hundred years that she would have felt fine._ Though, there was already one thing nagging her in the back of her mind that it was really pathetic just to take a nap instead of chatting with someone-_anyone really. _Instead, she chose the coward's way out because she couldn't face people.

_How did normal people did this? How do I have a conversation with someone without feeling that I'm going to bother them or worse? Would I look stupid and get judged for asking a simple question? _Those thoughts ran into her head as Carmen squeezed her eyes shut, bringing her knees to her chest and trying to take deep breaths, remembering her therapist's advice from when she first started therapy, _take deep breaths if you feel like you're panicking. It'd help to calm your amygdala down and able to think more._

Carmen took a deep breath, trying to focus on her breathing. She felt better after a few breaths, but now she really regretted taking a nap. She probably disappointed everyone. Carmen stretched her legs before going downstairs, hearing a quiet conversation going on.

Not wanting to interrupt, she stood there leaning on the staircase trying to listen in on the conversation. Carmen couldn't hear what they were saying, minus that it concerned her. She just really wished she could hear what they were saying.

They suddenly gone quiet, and Alice suddenly appeared right in front of her, nearly giving Carmen a heart attack.

"Jesus christ Alice, did you literally have to scare me like that," said Carmen, stepping backwards and almost losing her footing on the stairs.

"Sorry," said Alice enthusiastically. _How the hell was this girl enthusiastic about everything? Was she high? Scratch that, are they all high on drugs? Wait, is this a mob? What have I gotten myself into? _

"We're not part of the mob," said Edward coldly. Carmen looked at him briefly before glancing away. His stare was always unnerving especially when she got here, but she ignored it. It'd be fine right?

"Sorry I didn't mean to intrude or anything like that," responded Carmen. "I could leave if you want… I don't bother you guys or be an inconvenience."

"You're not an inconvenience… It's just a shock that's all," said the dirty-blonde haired guy, Jasper, if Carmen remembered right. The guy who instantly calmed her panic self back at the hospital and replaced with calming feelings.

"Sorry…" said Carmen awkwardly. It was a habit of her's to apologize for anything that went wrong - even if it wasn't her fault.

"Hey, stop apologizing," said Alice sternly, grabbing her by the shoulders. Carmen was surprised and she flinched under Alice's touch. Something that she'd always done for years even though she was no longer in harm's way. "It's not your fault."

Unfortunately for her, everyone saw her flinch from the touch.

"Are you okay?" asked the dark haired lady-Esme concerned.

"Yeah…" Carmen trailed off. This was not in the script she prepared mentally. She opened her mouth before closing it. _I should have been prepared more. Carmen thought to herself. Now they'd think I'm an idiot. _"I'm just not used to people touching me, especially unfamiliar people." And that was the truth. She was comfortable when people she knew really well touched her but when it came to strangers, well that was a whole different story.

...

Carmen quickly found herself starting to get comfortable around the Cullens. She was particularly fond of Emmett, Alice and Esme as they made her feel welcomed a lot more. Emmett reminded her of a brother, Alice was the enthusiastic one to bring up everyone's spirit and Esme was the mother figure. The others-Edward, Bella, Jasper, Rosalie mostly kept to themselves. Carlisle helped her a few times, and he was a good doctor, but she didn't want to know him on a personal level.

It still felt like a cult of some sorts as if they were hiding something from her. Carmen didn't pry as she had plenty of Secrets of her own and it wasn't right to pry into other people's private matters.

She didn't notice that it was starting to get dark until Alice said something as she was talking to Emmett about tackling bears a few times. It was a little weird, but it was fine. People did weird shit everyday.

"Come on, Carmen. It's getting late and I should go drop you off at your house," said Alice. Carmen glanced up at Alice before getting off the couch and following Alice outside.

When they got in the car, Carmen was the first one to break the silence.

"Do you know why Edward kept glaring at me?" asked Carmen, who was pulling out her phone in case there was any messages or calls. There wasn't. Not like she was really expecting anything. "He was glaring at me as if I murdered someone. And his girlfriend, just kept staring at him the whole time."

"Bella is a little self-centered at times. She's a good person. Edward is just a complicated person all around.

"If you say so. Seems like Edward is a wannabe emo," she muttered.

"Do you want to hang out sometime? I mean, with your friend in a coma and your all alone. It'd do you some good."

"I'd like that." For once since the car accident, she felt like she found someone that made her feel happy to be around. Lila was still a good person but after the accident, she wasn't sure if Lila would wake up soon. It seemed like there was a friendship blooming and maybe there was.

* * *

**I really apoligize that this chapter is short. I promise you the next one will be longer and there will time skips in it. We only have a few chapters left before the kings and I'm excited. Tell me what you think in the comments down below? If you have any suggestions or ideas, also tell me in the comments!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight and hermonine for reviewing! Reading In Moonlight, thanks for bringing that to my attention. She was in a state of panic and it tends to happen a lot. Carmen thought she was in danger (social anxiety causes you to think like that) and she was terrified. Her mind kinda shut down so she's often listening, but doesn't have too much control of her own thoughts and she was more worried about something happening. And plus she kinda accepted the Cullens are plain weird at least according to Carmen. **

**Chapter 9**

Weeks passed while Carmen finally settled into a routine, hoping for something normal in her life. Lila still hadn't woken up, so Carmen got a full-time job at the Diner. It was okay, and there was plenty of tips here and there. She also managed to get a lot closer to the Cullens, but she still felt like an outcast when she went over there on the weekends. God, she felt like she was in school again-referring things on weekdays and weekends.

Carmen found herself in the hospital sitting in the chair next to Lila's body. According to the doctors, the longer she spent in a coma-the less chance Lila would wake up. She grabbed Lila's hand and squeezed it tightly, wishing that Lila would wake up and she'd be alright.

"Lila… I don't know if you could hear me, but it's really hard without your presence. I found a new friend, Alice. She's white-but I don't think she cares if I'm Asian. She has your type of personality, but she loves shopping _a little too much_," said Carmen. "Her family is decent, but it's just hard without feeling like I'm intruding and it's obvious they're keeping a secret. They don't eat. I get why someone wouldn't want to eat in public because I've done the same, but I never see them eat something in their own house. I'm for not staying here for a while, but I'm beat after a long shift." Carmen stood up, pushing the chair back to its original place and left, looking at Lila-her slender, dark brown eyes remained close and her short black hair looked like it needed a good brushing. "I'm sorry."

She headed back to the house and cooked some spaghetti in the meantime. It was almost like she was autopilot as she turned on the stove, put a pot of water on it and started to chop up some vegetables and putting into a pan along with the uncooked meat.

Twenty minutes passed and Carmen sat on the couch-eating a bowl of spaghetti as she tried to find something interesting playing on, before tuning in on Disney Channel. She didn't mind it as they had interesting shows especially when they played-The Suite Life of Zack and Cody (especially as it was refreshing to see someone who looked like her be portrayed realistically), Hannah Montanna (double life with positive views on friendship), and That's So Raven (a black family that was so heartwarming).

Carmen sighed, placing her bowl down on the coffee table. She knew she couldn't keep living like this, and sooner or later, she'd have to move back to Jacksonville. The landlord was probably wondering why her rent hadn't come yet; but she still had a lease for another four months. It's easier to finish out the lease, instead of trying to break as it always _costly. _

She'll figure it out. Little did she know, she'll be leaving Forks forever and only coming back briefly.

…

Carmen heard a knock at the front door. She was about to take off her work clothes and get into her pajamas. She was grateful that she managed to take off her sports bra-which unfortunately, her breasts wasn't flat enough to actually go braless as she was AA; much like when was a preteen/teen and got on an undershirt which probably wouldn't work in this type of weather, but it'd do.

Carmen opened the door and she saw Alice at the front door, along with her boyfriend.

"Alice, what are you doing here?" asked Carmen, "I thought we didn't hang out together until later because of my work schedule and your family going camping."

"Carmen, we have to go," said Alice softly. _Go? Go where? This wasn't my doing was it? _She questioned, already starting to panic.

"Go where, Alice?" said Carmen starting to panic. Her thoughts already starting to race on where she messed up at. This had to be her fault. Only people left her life, because she always messed up somewhere.

"I'm sorry, but we have to leave town… I'll never forget about our time together. You're the best shopping buddy rather than Bella as she would wear a sweatshirt and jeans and call that good," said Alice, hugging her tightly which Carmen returned the gesture.

"Alice? Just for the record, did I do anything wrong that resulted you in leaving?" asked Carmen. She knew it was a stupid question, but she had to make sure. Somehow, she always ended up making someone leave after they grew close and she never saw them again.

"No," she responded and with that she left, leaving Carmen feeling like she was abandoned.

Why? Why did this always happened? Everytime, she got close to someone- they always left. Everytime, she opened her heart to someone; she was always left in pieces. Why did she opened her heart and actually made an effort in the relationship. Just once, Carmen wished she had the energy to cut someone out from her life without getting hurt.

…

_A week later,_

Carmen found herself at SeaTac airport, waiting to get checked in. She said the last of her goodbyes and told the Hospital to call her if Lila did wake up, but she didn't turn back once. Nothing remained here and it was only a temporary spot, just to see Lila. Only she didn't know what it'd affect her life in the future.

Carmen sighed as she waited until the person in front of her was done checking in before bringing her baggage to the ticket counter. Everything that she brought with her, along with a few photo-albums and her flute was in there that she couldn't bear to leave behind again. Carmen finally had music back in her life with her own instrument back, it was going to be fun.

"Um-Carmen Willis. Going to Orlando, Florida?" said Carmen, before the ticketer asked who the name was. He typed something on the computer, before saying something, "Any baggage? Personal, carryon or checked baggage?"

"Checked, and my carry-on." She motioned to her bag that was packed with things-but still under the limit. It was one of those endless bags that she used during 8th grade and freshman year of High School, yet was still in good condition. She lifted her suitcase onto the weigher and was only 40 pounds.

The ticket person handed her the ticket, and she took it with grace and headed towards where security was at. Being close to five in the morning, she waited patiently at security. It wasn't packed, but was already busy.

After a little over three hours, Carmen finally boarded the plane. It took roughly 45 minutes to get through security, and then the waiting as her flight was delayed for roughly two hours-because let's just have inconvience which was fucking wonderful and than took a while to get to her boarding zone. At least, Carmen was on her flight.

She found her seat, put on her seatbelt, pulling out her ipod and headphones and tucking her bag under the seat in front of her. She sighed and looked at the window-lucky that she managed to get a window seat, before putting her earbuds in her ears and listened to her music. It would be a good while before even touching down on Flordian soil. Roughly nine hours since it was cheaper with connecting than nonstop.

…

Ten hours later, Carmen found herself stranded in Orlando. It was eight o'clock at night, and she was stranded. She didn't had no friends who lived in Orlando and she doubted anyone would actually be willing to travel that far of a distance. It was over a two hour drive.

She sighed and found a bench to sit on. She didn't know what to do and she didn't just anyone here. Carmen decided to get up in a couple of minutes and did the one thing she hated, asking around if there was a bus or something among the means so she could get to Jacksonville.

Fortunately, there was. Bad news, it would be here in about half an hour or so. Carmen waited around, her stomach already rumbling but she paid no attention to it. She'd eat when she back to Jacksonville and go back to her apartment.

Roughly twenty minutes passed and bus pulled up to Jacksonville. She waited until after people boarded before getting on and paying the bus driver which was roughly $20, but It would do. She took her seat and checked her phone in the meantime - her emails, texts, phone calls.

There was only silence. Her ipod was dead and there was no way to charge it. There was only thing that she could do.

Take a nap.

Carmen let her eyes closed and tried to relax in her seat as the bus went on and soon, she knew no more until she got to Jacksonville close to midnight.

Carmen knew where she was at and walked back. It was only half an hour walk which wasn't too bad.

Thirty minutes passed and Carmen finally reached her apartment. She unlocked it and turned in the light. Everything looked like it was planned to be. She set her stuff down and didn't have to wait till long till she feel asleep on the couch.

Carmen never been grateful to be back home.

* * *

**I kinda just put chapter 10 with 9, but whatever. Carmen isn't rich (saving up over time, people pitying her, jobs online and of course her jobs). We're actually a chapter ahead than I wanted to, but the kings are in last bit of next chapter and chapter 11 to forward. Drop a review down below and tell me what you think!**

**I updated the synopsis and title so tell me what you think of those. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks to Reading In Moonlight, silverwinterwhite, and hermonine for reviewing! Your reviews help with inspiration and quicker updates! I apologize for not updating sooner, but I'm out of school for the rest of the year, and I had everything due last week. **

**Chapter 10**

"_Where's my sweetheart," her dad said. His footsteps echoing down the hallway, but Carmen sat there-rocking herself back and forth. Already, sixteen years old and she still couldn't find the courage to tell her dad no or call the police for that matter. She already knew what her father would do-maybe a whipping or carving words on her back. _

_Carmen didn't budge from her spot even when her father came in her room. Though, one thing that changed was the murderous glint in her eyes. _

Carmen woke up with a start. She grabbed her phone on the night-stand, hoping to see a message from Alice, maybe from the hospital. But there was only silence. Carmen would have hoped they would have kept in touch with her, if they were crushed that they had to leave. She was used to it.

Six months had passed since moving back to Jacksonville. Life went back to normal and the nightmares continued on. Having no money to buy energy drinks sucked; she couldn't wait until her paycheck came in to buy a few cases of energy drinks. She needed something to help with the nightmares.

She sighed before getting off the bed, grabbing two antidepressants from the capsule and taking a sip of her night-water. Her antidepressants hadn't been working recently, but she felt like a coward for not calling up her doctor in seeing what was wrong. It shouldn't be this hard to make an appointment, but Carmen felt ridiculous in doing so.

Anxiety was a disease that ate her brain; leaving only disease parts remaining.

Anxiety ruined everything.

**...**

And now, she found herself sitting in the doctor's office; wondering if she was going crazy or there was something even worse going on inside of her head. She already knew there was something wrong when she felt her thoughts start being anxious. It led to more panic attacks especially going out in public. It was like she was in high school again; trying to remain fine as she navigated through her classes. She acted like their was nothing wrong with her.

"I don't know what's wrong with me… I never felt like this before. I can't even go out of the house without panicking. Am I going insane?" Carmen said, looking towards the floor. "Or is my medication no longer working?"

"It's possible that you might have built up an immunity to the Serotonin-noradrenaline reuptake inhibitors medication; we may need to get a higher dosage for it, or we can get you started on Buspirone pills?" The doctor told her.

"We could trying use those pills. I've been taking those anti-depression meds for almost a decade now."

"Okay. We'll start the Buspirone pills off with twenty mg per day; it should improve your symptoms in three to four weeks. We'll keep your Serotonin-noradrenaline reuptake inhibitors going as it seems to be effective."

"Thanks," She said.

The doctor wrote Carmen a prescription and she left the office. At least, she finally knew what was wrong with her; though she didn't know if it was normal for her anxiety to change.

…

Right after Carmen picked up her new prescription, Music and Arts called her. She wasn't scheduled for work; it seemed that everyone called off sick or something. Unfortunately, it now caused her being bored out of her mind.

Carmen stood at the front register, hoping a customer would come and buy something. Standing around doing nothing wasn't fun.

"Hey, Carmen?" One of her coworkers-Wrenn said approaching her.

"Yeah?" Carmen responded back, "What do you need?"

"A girl is coming in and look at some advance flutes… I have a family emergency so I can't be there," They said.

"I hope everything is okay," She responded back before Wrenn took off to due their family emergency. She wasn't going to pry information.

Carmen sighed and pulled out her phone to check the time. Her heart nearly skipped a beat as she was a message from Alice; before she could even look at the text, the door opened to reveal a white guy with grayish hair and his daughter. This must have been the people that Wrenn was talking about.

She headed towards the back and found two flutes that were intermediate level. It wasn't hard to find as the flutes were just delivered yesterday- last time she had work.

Carmen opened the cases and assembled the flutes together. She stood there as she watched the girl hold the flutes and start playing them a little bit.

"Pick out which one you like," the dad said, and the girl nodded. Both of the brands were good.

"But I don't know," the girl said.

It was only a few minutes before the girl made a decision; going after the one that was cheapest-$50 monthly instead of the $60 one. Carmen rang the girl up and they left without another word.

Carmen turned on her phone and read the text message.

_Be home by 6. There's an emergency that concerns you _

That was pretty cryptic, but she nodded before realizing she was an idiot for doing that. Alice couldn't see that she nodded. _Idiot, _she told herself.

Luckily her shift ended up at 5:30 which only gave her roughly twenty-five minutes to get home. And besides, she only had roughly two or three hours to go.

…

Nearly three hours later, Carmen found herself at home. She took off her shoes and sat on the couch, before groaning when she heard the door knock. She got up and opened the door to see a covered up Alice.

"Alice?" Carmen questioned, "What are you doing here?"

"I sent you a text… Anyways, there's no time to explain," Alice said in a rush.

"Alright. Where are we going?" She said.

"Forks," Alice responded and Carmen had to do a double take. A place she hadn't been and now she was to go there. She almost let out a whine but went along with it. "We'll leave in five minutes… I just hope we're not too late."

Carmen ignored Alice and went to find a small bag to put stuff in it. Carmen raced to grab a change of clothes, her charger, headphones, ipod, medication and put it in a small bag. She grabbed her phone, keys on the way out after putting on her shoes. She wasn't sure how long she'd be gone; it was better safe than sorry.

"Why are you dragging me back to Forks?" Carmen asked.

"I had a vision that Bella jump off a cliff... " Alice said, already driving on the direction to Forks. Carmen had no idea why she was speeding, but it was fine; though she knew it was going to be a long drive to Forks. Though, she couldn't get behind on why Alice wanted her there-when she was twenty-six years old, and Bella was a high school student.

"Vision? Are you a physic of some sorts?"

"Of some sorts," Alice responded.

She sighed. She reached for her headphones, and ipod and started listening to music. She leaned against the window, and closed her eyes. There was nothing better to do.

…

After a long car ride, Carmen looked outside. It was dark out and it looked like they were back in Forks. She was a familiar old, batted red truck pulled up and Alice with nowhere in sighed. There was no way she was going to enter someone else's house, especially someone she didn't know.

After what it seemed to be a few minutes, Alice and Bella rushed in the car and Carmen sat there, baffled. She had no idea what was happening, but there was no way in hell, she would go ask someone. Alice started speeding to the airport and she was even more confused.

"Alice, why are you heading to the airport?" Carmen asked quietly.

"Edward decided he wanted to kill himself, after Rosalie told him where I went. Unfortunately, Bella is the only one that could save him," Alice explained.

"And you need me why?" Seriously, Alice. Edward hates my guts. There is no way he'd appreciate me," Carmen snapped.

"You're a matter of life or death, Carmen."

"Wait what?"

* * *

**So I lied. There was stuff I added since I wanted to bring up her anxiety issues. It was really something unexpected, but hey the kings are next chapter. I promise it would be up sooner than a two week wait. I'll try to get the next chapter out on Christmas. Drop a review down below and tell me what you think!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks to hermonine, silverwinterwhite and Hats24 for reviewing! Some of the stuff is from the book, so I hope you don't mind. Enjoy an extra long chapter just for it being Christmas! Also if I'm still doing this story in a year from now, I'd love to make a Christmas chapter. **

**Chapter 11**

"Carmen, you have to trust me on this," Alice started. "Please. They'll explain everything to you. You have to trust me."

"They?"

"The Volturi," She said. _The Volturi? _Carmen thought. _They sounded like a cult. Probably something similar to what the Cullens are. Wait, would I be some sort of freak to them? Someone they make me feel like I'm not wanted? _Panic started to arise. She felt her heart beat fast in her chest. All of a sudden, she was unable to breathe.

_Why am I having a panic attack in front of these people? _Carmen questioned herself, clenching her fists tightly to the point where they turned white. _They're probably thinking that I'm crazy for doing something._

"Breathe, Carmen, breathe," Alice told her gently. She ignored the advice as she hated those words, '_Breathe. Calm down. You're being overdramatic. Quit being so negative. It's always your fault. You're overreacting. It's not so bad.' _those words echoed in her head.

"Can you give me two pills of my SNRI pills?" she told Alice, as she tried to rock herself back in forth. Alice did so quickly, and Carmen took them without something to drink. It was a little challenging, but there wasn't any water available; there was no way in hell she'd ask for any.

The panic started to fade after five minutes and she felt better.

"Sorry… I didn't know that would happen," murmured Carmen.

"It's fine," Alice brushed off, already speeding through the airport's traffic. Alice parked the car and Bella jumped out like there was no tomorrow. Carmen didn't understand the big deal of it. Sure, her boyfriend is going to kill himself, but was he really worth it? From what she has seen of Bella in the car and hanging out, she was pretty obsessed with the guy.

She couldn't understand why someone would become obsessed with someone. Or fall in love with someone for that matter. Love was a complicated thing that she still couldn't get behind even being a grown adult. How did someone get crushes? How did someone get into a relationship with a guy?

….

They narrowly made the flight. Carmen didn't know how that happened, but she ignored as she tried to relax in the seat. She noticed Bella bouncing in her seat once she got in it. _It seemed that someone was anxious to see her boyfriend_ she mused.

The plane sat idle on the tarmac while the flight attendants strolled casually up and down the aisle, patting the bags in the overhead compartments to make sure everything fit. The pilots leaned out of the cockpit, chatting with them as they passed.

After a few minutes, the plane rolled lazily from the gate, building speed with a gradual steadiness that seem to torture Bella. Carmen sighed before plugging in her headphones and turning on her ipod. She wasn't going to pay attention to them.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Alice lift the phone on the back of the seat in front of her before the plane stopped climbing. She turned her back on the stewardess who eyed her with disapproval. Carmen lifted her headphones and tried to listen in on what Alice was saying.

"I can't be sure, I keep seeing him do different things, he keeps changing his mind. A killing spree through the city, attacking the guard, lifting a car over his head in the main square-mostly things that would expose them. He knows that's the fastest way to force a reaction."

Eventually, Carmen couldn't hear Alice talking form where she sat and put her headphones back on. She felt a headache to form so she turned down her music in time to hear Bella say something. Barely.

She paused the music and listened in.

"Who are these Volturi?" Bella whispered "What makes them so much more dangerous than Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, and you?" _What? _

"I was surprised that you recognized the name," Alice said. "That you understood so immediately what it meant when I said he was going to Italy. I thought I would have to explain. How much did Edward tell you?"

"He just said they were an old, powerful family like royalty. That you didn't antagonize them unless you wanted to die," Bella whispered back. Carmen could hear that Bella had a problem with the last word.

"You have to understand," she said, her voice slower, more measured now. "We Cullens are unique in more ways than you know. It's abnormal for so many of us to live together in peace. It's the same for Tanya's family in the north, and Carlisle speculates that abstaining makes it easier for us to be civilized, to form bonds based on love rather than survival or convenience. Even James's little coven of three was unusually large and you saw how easily Laurent left them. Our kind travel alone, or in pairs, as a general rule. Carlisle's family is the biggest in existence, as far as I know, with the one exception. The Volturi.

"There were three of them originally, Aro, Caius, and Marcus."

"I've seen them," Bella mumbled. "In the picture in Carlisle's study."

Alice nodded. "Two females joined them over time, and the five of them make up the family. I'm not sure, but I suspect that their age is what gives them the ability to live peacefully together. They are well over three thousand years old. Or maybe it's their gifts that give them extra tolerance. Like Edward and I, Aro and Marcus are talented."

She continued on, "Or maybe it's just their love of power that binds them together. Royalty is an apt description."

"But if there are only five."

"Five that make up the family," she corrected. "That doesn't include their guard."

"That sounds serious."

"Oh, it is," Alice said. "There were nine members of the guard that were permanent, the last time we heard. Others are more transitory. It changes. And many of them are gifted as well with formidable gifts, gifts that make what I can do look like a parlor trick. The Volturi chose them for their abilities, physical or otherwise."

Alice continued on, "They don't get into too many confrontations. No one is stupid enough to mess with them. They stay in their city, leaving only as duty calls."

"Duty?" I wondered.

"Didn't Edward tell you what they do?"

"No."

Carmen frowned. It seemed that whatever the Volturi was, they were like a cult government figure. She couldn't hear anything after that until a loud voice rang through.

"There are rules?"

"Shh!" Alice hushed her. Carmen was confused, but after that. Their conversation didn't seem to be really important anymore.

…

They finally arrived in Florence after a layover in New York. It was a long flight, and her ipod barely made it until New York. It was a long flight, but they barely made it out before Alice managed to get a yellow Porsche car. It was a nice looking care she had to admit.

Carmen and Bella quickly got in the car. They barely had time to put on their seatbelt before Alice started waving through the traffic and headed out into the countryside.

Carmen gazed through the window looking at the landscape. It was beautiful, but she couldn't enjoy it as Alice drove quickly.

They soon arrived in a small town. People wore red cloaks and carried red flags as they headed into one direction. It seemed like it was a celebration of some sorts.

"There's something going on," Alice muttered. "Some kind of festival. The streets are full of people and red flags. What's the date today?"

"The nineteenth, maybe?" Bella answered.

"Well, that's ironic. It's Saint Marcus Day."

"Which means?"

Alice chuckled. Carmen's attention was on her as she explained on what the people were doing. "The city holds a celebration every year. As the legend goes, a Christian missionary, Father Marcus. Marcus of the Volturi, in fact drove all the vampires from Volterra fifteen hundred years ago. The story claims he was martyred in Romania, still trying to drive away the vampire scourge. Of course that's nonsense, he's never left the city. But that's where some of the superstitions about things like crosses and garlic come from. Father Marcus used them so successfully. And vampires don't trouble Volterra, so they must work." Her smile was sardonic. "It's become more of a celebration of the city, and recognition for the police force after all, Volterra is an amazingly safe city. The police get the credit."

"They're not going to be very happy if Edward messes things up for them on St. Marcus Day, are they?"

She shook her head, her expression grim. "No. They'll act very quickly." _Okay. _She had no idea what that really meant, but she had a feeling that she might find out soon.

Alice told her what to do and Bella jumped out of the car with instructions. Alice drove slowly before she found a parking space and Carmen followed her.

"Just be careful in there, Carmen. Just trust me when I say, they won't hurt you," Alice whispered. Carmen was very confused on those words, but she followed Alice to the castle.

…

Carmen could hear voices-mean arguing as they approached closer to where they were at. She heard the familiar voice of Edward and Bella. It looked like Bella finally made it to her _precious boyfriend in time. _

"Let's behave ourselves, shall we?" Alice said. "There are ladies present." Carmen watched as Alice made her way next to Edward. She already felt like a third wheel here, or maybe she was intruding in whatever their business was. _Actually why she did let Alice convince her to come first of all? _

The short guy compared to the fucking giant standing next to him, and said, "Please, Edward, let's be reasonable."

"Let's," Edward agreed. "And we'll leave quietly now, with no one the wiser."

The same guy sighed in frustration. "At least let us discuss this more privately."

Edward's gritted his teeth together before he hissed out, "No."

The giant smiled. Carmen really felt confused now. She was about to open her mouth and say something-or well try. She hated asking questions in general. From past experiences, from feeling like she was being judged and getting ignored after asking one; it had made her hesitant in asking something.

"Enough."

The newcomer was short; almost as tall as Alice was. She had blonde hair, chalky white skin and red eyes. She was also wearing a darker cloak than the two men. Carmen noticed how both men stepped back from their offensive positions. It seemed whoever this person was; held significant status in the mob or whatever this was. She gave Carmen shivers as she glanced her way-confusement scrawled upon the girl's face.

"Jane," Edward sighed in recognition, and relaxed his posture.

"Follow me," Jane spoke again, her childish voice a monotone. She turned their back and Carmen caught up to her quickly.

"What is going on?' Carmen asked. She knew the question was stupid, most likely. She didn't had too much time to rehearse it when her head. _Wait? Did I stutter? Was it not proper grammar? _

"Nothing that concerns you… Those three on the other hand will be testified," Jane responded, and Carmen nodded.

…

After a while, they finally arrived at their destination-whatever that was. Carmen could hear Bella hyperventilating and she wanted to strangle her. From where they were at here, Bella really needed to be smacked. She whined and clinged to her boyfriend. Carmen scowled, wishing that they wouldn't rub it in that they were in love. Not all of them could be lucky and find someone. Not all of them were interested in romance.

They entered the room, and Carmen looked around nervously. She bit her bottom lip a few times, as she felt really awkward-more than usual. She noticed a raven haired man with the same white skin as everyone else. Carmen felt out of place as she looked around, noticing that she was in a sea of white people.

She looked at him, and it felt like a wound was trying to heal itself. He made eye contact, and his eyes turned to her. His smile became more ecstatic, and he approached her. Carmen wanted to shrink under his gaze, wishing that she was able to disappear.

"Mia cara, we have found you," He said. He took her hands and placed in his cold hands. She could have sworn his expression changed into a frown, but was gone before her brain could even register it. His smiling facade was still present as he turned to the giant and said,

""Felix, be a dear and tell my brothers about our company. I'm sure they wouldn't want to miss this."

"Yes, Master." Felix nodded before disappearing.

The raven-haired man looked at her for a few seconds, before putting his attention on Alice, Edward and Bella.

"And Alice and Bella, too!" he rejoiced, clapping his thin hands together. "This is a happy surprise! Wonderful!"

"You see, Edward?" The strange vampire turned and smiled at Edward like a fond but scolding grandfather. "What did I tell you? Aren't you glad that I didn't give you what you wanted yesterday?"

"Yes, Aro, I am," Edward agreed.

"I love a happy ending." Aro sighed. "They are so rare. But I want the whole story. How did this happen? Alice?" He turned to gaze at Alice with curious, misty eyes. "Your brother seemed to think you infallible, but apparently there was some mistake."

"Oh, I'm far from infallible." She flashed a dazzling smile. "As you can see today, I cause problems as often as I cure them."

"You're too modest," Aro chided. "I've seen some of your more amazing exploits, and I must admit I've never observed anything like your talent. Wonderful!"

"I'm sorry, we haven't been introduced properly at all, have we? It's just that I feel like I know you already, and I tend to get ahead of myself. Your brother introduced us yesterday, in a peculiar way. You see, I share some of your brother's talent, only I am limited in a way that he is not." Aro shook his head; his tone was envious.

"And also exponentially more powerful," Edward added dryly. He looked at Alice as he swiftly explained. "Aro needs physical contact to hear your thoughts, but he hears much more than I do. You know I can only hear what's passing through your head in the moment. Aro hears every thought your mind has ever had."

And that explained everything. Carmen wondered why Edward seemed to be able to hear thoughts, and why Aro seemed to give her a strange look briefly.

"But to be able to hear from a distance," Aro sighed. "That would be so convenient."

All of a sudden. Aro looked over their shoulders along with everyone in the room. I glanced over my shoulder to see two black-robed men. Both looked very much like Aro, one even had the same flowing black hair. The other had a shock of honey-blonde hair, the same shade as his face that brushed against his shoulders. Their faces had identical, paper-thin skin. One seem to be bored while the other looked completely sour.

"Marcus, Caius, look!" Aro crooned. "Look who I found!" He gestured to Carmen and she felt all eyes look at her. _You probably have something on your clothes. _The voice in her head told her. Even though she knew she didn't, she still had to check. There wasn't.

_'You're okay. You're fine.' _Carmen thought to herself trying to keep her panic low. She didn't want to worry anyone. It was better keeping it inside than share it.

Marcus and Caius looked at her and she met them in the eyes. She felt like she was finally complete which was odd since she didn't know what she was missing.

"Bella is alive after all, and Alice is here with her! Isn't that wonderful?" Aro continued on. "Let us have the story."

The honey-blonde drifted away towards one of the thrones. The bored looking one paused beside Aro and touched Aro's hand briefly.

"Thank you, Marcus," Aro said. "That's quite interesting."

Carmen opened her mouth to say something, but closed it. Now was not the time to say something. She remained quiet while Aro conducted his business. She stood there, grateful that no one was really paying attention to her.

Aro was shaking his head. "Amazing," he said. "Absolutely amazing."

Carmen barely heard Edward as he explained whatever Marcus's gift was; something about seeing relationships, but she couldn't really catch the rest.

Aro smiled. "So convenient," he repeated to himself. Then he shifted his attention back to them again. "It takes quite a bit to surprise Marcus, I can assure you." That probably would explain why he looks bored even now, while he keeps glancing at her occasionally.

"It's just so difficult to understand, even now," Aro mused, "How can you stand so close to her like that?"

"It's not without effort," Edward answered calmly.

"But still la tua cantante! What a waste!" _La tua what? _Carmen was really confused on whatever that means. Luckily, her Spanish teacher back in High School (who she still thought pitied her after that day), told her class that Spanish is similar to other languages. Or was it her World Cultures teacher that said it? She only knew a little bit of cantante since it almost sounded like cantar.

Edward chuckled. "I look at it more as a price."

Aro was skeptical. "A very high price."

"Opportunity cost."

Aro laughed. "If I hadn't smelled her through your memories, I wouldn't have believed the call of anyone's blood could be so strong. I've never felt anything like it myself. Most of us would trade much for such a gift, and yet you."

"Waste it," Edward finished, his voice sarcastic now. Carmen glared daggers at him. _Was he fucking serious?_ She may not have the full picture, but when these people screamed like royalty and someone you should respect, you do not get sarcastic with others. She doubted that he actually had a job. It was one of the unspoken rules about everything.

Aro laughed again. "Ah, how I miss my friend Carlisle! You remind me of him only he was not so angry."

"Carlisle outshines me in many other ways as well."

"I certainly never thought to see Carlisle bested for self-control of all things, but you put him to shame."

"Hardly." Edward sounded impatient.

"I am gratified by his success," Aro mused. "Your memories of him are quite a gift for me, though they astonish me exceedingly. I am surprised by how it pleases me, his success in this unorthodox path he's chosen. I expected that he would waste, weaken with time. I scoffed at his plan to find others who would share his peculiar vision. Yet, somehow, I'm happy to be wrong."

Edward didn't reply.

"But your restraint!" Aro sighed. "I did not know such strength was possible. To endure yourself against such a siren call, not just once but again and again if I had not felt it myself, I would not have believed."

"Just remembering how she appeals to you," Aro chuckled. "It makes me thirsty."

_Was I the only that freaked by the last part. Alrighty time to say something, Carmen,_ she told herself. If she was a normal person,questions wouldn't be hard. _Wait, what am I going to say 'Sorry to interrupt, but can someone tell what's going on? Okay that should work, I hope. Now time to rehearse the question over and over. _

Edward tensed.

"Don't be disturbed," Aro reassured him. "I mean her no harm. But I am so curious about one thing in particular." He eyed Bella with bright interest. "May I?" he asked eagerly, lifting one hand.

"Ask her," Edward suggested in a flat voice.

"Of course, how rude of me!" Aro exclaimed. "Bella, I'm fascinated that you are the one exception to Edward's impressive talent so very interesting that such a thing should occur! And I was wondering, since our talents are similar in many ways, if you would be so kind as to allow me to try to see if you are an exception for me, as well?"

Bella gave her hand to him.

"So very interesting," he said as he released my hand and drifted back, and headed to Carmen.

"Mia cara, may I have your hand?" He asked. Carmen gave him her hand. His smile disappeared into a frown, and she could tell in his eyes, that he felt sorry for her.

"I'm sorry, mia cara. After this, we'll explain everything," He whispered to her and Carmen nodded. Aro went back to his original standing spot and continued on.

"I wonder if she is immune to our other talents Jane, dear?"

"No!" Edward snarled the word.

Jane smiled up happily at Aro. "Yes, Master?"

Then he spoke to Jane. "I was wondering, my dear one, if Bella is immune to you."

The next thing, Carmen knew was that Edward was on the ground; in a fit of seizures. It was quite relaxing almost and probably would teach Edward matters; thought she doubt that he knew what matters and personal space was.

"Stop!" Bella shrieked.

"Jane," Aro recalled her in a tranquil voice. She looked up quickly, still smiling with pleasure, her eyes questioning. As soon as Jane looked away, Edward was still.

Jane turned her smile in Bella's direction. Carmen saw Bella tensed up, but she wasn't in a fit of seizures like Edward was. Suddenly, Edward jumped up onto his feet-too quickly for a human to move.

Aro laughed before reassuring Jane, "Don't be put out, dear one," Aro said in a comforting tone, placing a powder-light hand on her shoulder. "She confounds us all."

"Ha, ha, ha," Aro chortled again. "You're very brave, Edward, to endure in silence. I asked Jane to do that to me once just out of curiosity." He shook his head in admiration. Carmen was curious, but there was no way she was going to ask.

Edward glared, disgusted.

"So what do we do with you now?" Aro sighed.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Edward and Alice stiffened.

"I don't suppose there's any chance that you've changed your mind?" Aro asked Edward hopefully. "Your talent would be an excellent addition to our little company."

Edward hesitated before saying, "I'd rather not."

"Alice?" Aro asked, still hopeful. "Would you perhaps be interested in joining with us?"

"No, thank you," Alice said.

"And you, Bella?" Aro raised his eyebrows.

There was a pause before Caius, whom Carmen almost forgotten he was there.

"What?" he demanded of Aro; his voice, though no more than a whisper, was flat.

"Caius, surely you see the potential," Aro chided him affectionately. "I haven't seen a prospective talent so promising since we found Jane and Alec. Can you imagine the possibilities when she is one of us?"

Caius looked away with a caustic expression before settling on her.

Bella answered, but it was too quiet from where she was standing to even hear it.

Aro sighed. "That's unfortunate. Such a waste."

Edward hissed. "Join or die, is that it? I suspected as much when we were brought to this room. So much for your laws."

"Of course not." Aro blinked, astonished. "We were already convened here, Edward, awaiting Heidi's return. Not for you."

"Aro," Caius hissed. "The law claims them."

Edward glared at Caius. "How so?" he demanded.

Caius pointed a skeletal finger at Bella and Carmen. "They know too much. You have exposed our secrets."

"Um actually, I barely even know what is happening. They just happen to drag me here," Carmen spoke quietly. She didn't dare to look at anyone, just stared at the floor.

"There are a few humans in on your charade here, as well," Edward reminded him. _Humans? You're going to tell me that these people are not human? _Carmen questioned herself. _There has to be a perfect explanation for this. I merely skipped out on my medication. I'm just going crazy that's all. _

"Yes," he agreed. "But when they are no longer useful to us, they will serve to sustain us. That is not your plan for this one. If she betrays our secrets, are you prepared to destroy her? I think not," he scoffed.

"Nor do you intend to make her one of us," Caius continued. "Therefore, she is a vulnerability. Though it is true, for this, only her life is forfeit. You may leave if you wish."

"That's what I thought," Caius said.

"Unless," Aro interrupted. He looked unhappy with the way the conversation had gone. "Unless you do intend to give her immortality?" _Immortality? What did this had to do with that? _

Edward answered. "And if I do?"

Aro smiled, happy again. "Why, then you would be free to go home and give my regards to my friend Carlisle." His expression turned more hesitant. "But I'm afraid you would have to mean it."

Aro raised his hand in front of him.

Caius, who had begun to scowl furiously, relaxed.

Alice approached him and Aro took her hand. Carmen could have sworn that she saw a murderous look on his face before it was replaced with a smile.

"That was fascinating!"

Alice smiled. "I'm glad you enjoyed it."

"To see the things you've seen especially the ones that haven't happened yet!" He shook his head in wonder.

"But that will," she reminded him, voice calm.

"Yes, yes, it's quite determined. Certainly there's no problem."

"Aro," Caius complained.

"Dear Caius," Aro smiled. "Do not fret. Look who they brought us!" He gestured to Carmen, "They brought our mate after all this time!" Carmen tuned out the rest, only focusing on what Aro said. _Our mate? Our mate. _Those words repeated in her head, before it all came too much. She no longer could focus on her thoughts, before it all came tumbling down.

* * *

**I'm starting to think I really love writing cliffhangers. This was a long chapter to make it up, and since I'm in a Christmas spirit! Happy Holidays everyone! Drop a review down below and tell me what you think!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thanks to silverwinterwhite, Jmah0ca, hermonine and seraphina987 for reviewing! This chapter would have been up earlier, but this chapter did not want to be written (proof because I wrote one paragraph before erasing it), and I managed to get sick. Normally, colds don't kill me but this cold that I'm still dealing with, but this cold was different. Possibly because my ear is STILL clogged-most of it is due to fluids trapped inside (it's getting better), and I finally got to the point where I have been trying to pop my ear. **

**This chapter might suck as I mentioned before. This did NOT want to be written, so I've been struggling with what to do. And also, because January just hit. I'm not going to have much writing time next week due to the Musical, but don't worry. I'll try to get an update out weekly. **

**Chapter 12**

Carmen couldn't feel anything. The one cord that tried to keep her from being fine snapped. She wanted to scream, cry that something in her shifted and she didn't know what. She hated this feeling; she hated feeling like she had no control over her thoughts. Now, it felt like she was merely a passenger in her own car, instead of being the driver. _Fuck. _

Carmen hated this feeling. It happened a few times. The night after graduation where her father decided to give her a celebration and the pain was followed. She barely remembered that event. All she remembered was that her body inflicted harm, but her emotional state wasn't there. Her therapist called it Dissociation when she was stuck having to recall years of inflicted pain.

Unfortunately, she didn't remember how to get out of the state right now. Maybe, she should count backwards from 100? No, that wouldn't work. Oh well, she'd figure it out. Hopefully.

"Wait what?" Carmen asked, the voice sounded like her own, but it didn't. "Sorry," She murmured to herself. _Focus. Just concentrate on one thing. _So she did. She focused on her black tennis shoes-_black with a little bit of wite on the side of her shoes. Black laces. _

The ground was a solid gray color with no cracks that she could see. It helped with this feeling, and she slowly felt herself returning to her body. _Well, at least it was better than nothing _

"Sorry, mia cara? What do you mean?" Aro asked confused. _Okay. _He was NOT supposed to hear that. Wait, how did he actually hear that? _This is just like the Cullens and how weird they are._

"It's nothing. Just forget about it," Carmen said quickly. She was surprised that she didn't stumble over her words like she normally did in a situation like this.

Aro sent her a curious glance. He looked like he wanted to see her hand again, but she didn't want him to touch her. There was no way she'd be able to walk over there without stumbling in front of these people and she had to rein in her thoughts.

"Then we are free to go now?" Edward interrupted.

"Yes, yes," Aro said pleasantly. "But please visit again. It's been absolutely enthralling!"

"And we will visit you as well," Caius promised, "To be sure that you follow through on your side. Were I you, I would not delay too long. We do not offer second chances."

"Felix, be a dear and escort Carmen to her room. Attend to her any needs, my brothers and I will be up shortly," Aro said. Felix appeared right by her side and she nearly jumped.

"This way, my queen." He beckoned her to follow him and she did. She caught sight of the Cullens briefly. She gave them a glare on the way out. She was really confused by all this and she just wanted answers.

…

Felix opened the door to where she'd be staying. It was a lot bigger than her room in Lila's house and her apartment all together. There was a queen size bed which she sat down upon and was really comfy. Okay, this was heaven. There was a door right across and a second door. She figured that one probably was a closet, and the other was to the bathroom.

Well, if she was going to stay here for a while. She needed to go back home to figure stuff out. There was too many priceless belongings that couldn't be replaced.

"Do you need anything, my queen?" He asked. _My queen? _Okay, she kinda really hated formalities especially around her. _Do NOT stutter. _She told herself, before responding,

"Could-Could I have something to drink? W-Water or something?" _Why did I stutter? Oh my god, does he think I'm stupid or something. Way to mess things up, Carmen, _she scolded herself. _I wish I could just start over on that. _

If there was one thing that she hated was being unprepared to say something. She didn't like to be caught off guard when talking to someone and it made her feel a thousand times worse when it shouldn't bother her.

"Certainly, my queen." He quickly disappeared and Carmen blinked rapidly.

"Stupid. Let's go be pathetic and stutter- why don't I?" She said to herself. She glanced up and saw that Felix returned with a glass of water.

"Shit… How much did you hear?" Carmen asked.

"Not much, my queen. It sounded like you were beating yourself up over what you requested," Felix said. He handed her the glass of water and she took it.

"Thanks," she said. She grabbed the strap of her bag and found two similar orange bottles with small white pills in them. She poured the right amount of each one in her hand and popped them in her mouth. Two sips of water and the pills were finally in her system.

"Please don't tell them about this," She begged, tucking her pill bottles back into her bag. "I don't want them to think less of me."

"I'll keep my mouth shut - but you'll have to tell them eventually. What is wrong, my queen?"

"It's just my mental illness I've had for a while. The doctors say that I'm going to be like this my whole life with how severe it is," she explained, "Sorry, I don't why I'm telling you this."

"You don't have to apologize for everything, my queen. I'm not offended."

"Thanks…"

"It looks like they're done feeding. I'll be back, my queen."

She nodded and stared at the floor. She hugged her knees tightly into her chest for a few before she heard a knock at the door.

* * *

**Okay. This chapter is on the shortest side because it just gave me issues. I promise the next chapter will be a lot longer as they are things I want to address. Most specifically for Carmen asexual/aromatic. She won't be falling head over hills for them for a while , but it's a good start. **

**Drop a review down below and tell me what you think! **


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks to hermonine, silverwinterwhite, FrenchGirl05 and Reading In Moonlight for reviewing! Thanks for being so caring during the last chapter on that the last chapter isn't quite dull-I kinda thought it was. By the way, I do not know what happened with this chapter. It just decided it's going this direction. Also, I didn't display the kings reactions, but they wanted to keep everything private. I hope that clears it up. **

**The ironic thing is when I wrote the last chapter-a few days later, I actually experienced dissociation right after injuring my pinky. All I remember was that I was panicking when I got hit by a medball (hard, small, and weighed more than 10 pounds it felt like). I was full on panicking and close to crying and the teacher called me over to check my fingers because it hurt so bad. Then I lost control and I felt really lightheaded. None of my actions were mine and I was still panicking. Even water didn't help and I dissociated twice within an hour almost three times. I barely remember anything that happened during that time and after. Needless to day, I can't ever forgive my English teacher for what she did that day. **

**Chapter 12**

_Don't panic _Carmen told herself. _Just breathe. It'll be okay. You're not in trouble. _She told herself.

"Come in," she said, her voice cracked. She winced, but settled into her mask before any emotions slipped out.

The three men she saw earlier stopped in front of her. The three guys were hot-she had to admit. She didn't feel anything towards them - but she could still look at other people.

"il mio amore, how are you feeling?" Aro asked.

"Better." Carmen gave a soft smile to show that she was.

It was true, she was no longer in a panicky state anymore, she felt a little more relaxed and her anxiety wasn't making her wish she'd disappear. She felt her antidepressants working functionality finally - but nothing from her new ones yet. The doctor did say three weeks till she finally notice something.

"So can someone explain to me what is going on?" She said, getting straight to the point.. _Too boldly. I really hope my voice didn't crack or anything. _She knew there was something going on, but her skills in what people perceived of her was terrible; she often thought they were talking about her and all the crazy things her social anxiety did and still does today, and she was generally oblivious to things.

She could remember a few times in high school. Carmen had a guy best friend who she was really close to back in high school before cutting herself away from the friendship. Now, that she thought of it-it was due to social anxiety ruining her life in its silent, deadly way.

Lila had always brought him up during Trig/Pre-Calc Honors that she was his girlfriend. Her answer was the same, 'she wasn't interested in him.' never giving out why, since she was still closeted. She didn't know that Lila and her friends talked about her behind her back about this. It was still something that she never forgiven her for, but Lila remained to be someone she loved.

It was just one of her faults. In exchange for having a mental illness, she remained oblivious to things happening.

"My brothers and I are my vampires," Aro said. _Okay? _She looked at their expressions and they were serious. Carmen was hoping they were kidding and pulled a prank on her like that mate thing.

_Fuck. If they were vampires, that meant the Cullens were ones too right? _

"Are the Cullens vampires too?" She whispered. Deep in her gut, she knew the answer was because it explained everything. _How Edward seem to read her mind, the impossible speed, the way Alice wanted to be her friend. _It finally made sense.

"Yes, my dear," Aro said to her.

Carmen wanted to yell, scream or cry even, but she remained still. She should have known better. They kept secrets from her, look at her like she needs pity; she had a feeling that was a person of color that caused it.

"Fuck…" she whispered. "That makes sense. Alice had this weird physic side and how Edward seem to read my mind. Why didn't they tell me?"

"Most likely wanted to keep you secret from us," Caius hissed. "Which would be an unfortunate thing to do." Carmen fiddled with her hands, trying to do something.

She opened her mouth. She prayed this question wasn't stupid or anything, but the question has been bugging her for a while.

"Anyways, the whole mate thing. What does that mean? Being your mate and all?" She clarified. She was very confused by all this. "You mentioned it earlier I think… I just don't remember exactly what happened." Her voice was barely a whisper by the time she finished.

Her memory was still so hazy. One moment, she was trying to understand what was happening before her panicking happened and that was all. Anything after she dissociated, Carmen couldn't remember.

"A mate is someone who completes that person as a whole… You're mated to all three of us," Caius said. Carmen gaped before an uneasy feeling settled in her stomach. She knew what mate meant, but it clarified on the other part of it.

Carmen pursed her lips and stayed quiet. She always did when Lila discussed boys with some of her other white friends. She knew she wasn't straight.

For the longest period, she thought she was bisexual because she had some sexual attraction thoughts towards woman, but she also had "crushes" on guys. But she started questioning because she often felt broken, or incomplete because she never felt sexually attracted to anyone minus a few after an emotional connection formed first.

All of her teachers who taught about sex ed. always told them about sex usually. Though, she remembered this one weird volunteer who told them not to have sex to anyone they'd regret. And talked about the three types of sex a person may have, and Carmen was already familiar with two.

But, they never talked about those not interested in romance or sex. Maybe it was because her father violated her like that, that swore her off of sex forever. She figured it would happen when she reached sixteen, seventeen or even eighteen, that the romance spark would hit her like everyone else had.

It never did. Carmen quickly figured out that she was demisexual-though that term is now iffy. And eventually figured out she was grayromantic-person who sometimes experience romantic attraction.

"Yeah about the mate thing. What would happen if one person wasn't really romantically attracted to anyone?" They gave her a confused look, before Aro asked,

"What do you mean, my dear?"

_Fuck. _She walked into that too. _Let's go open my mouth shall we? _She didn't want to come out like this. She wanted to come out when she felt comfortable, but she was scared of how they'd react. Would they aphobic and hate her, maybe shun her because she couldn't really love them? _Just rip off the bandaid. It'd be fine right? _

After several unsuccessful tries of voicing why she was like that, she finally did it.

"I'm Grayromantic." Seeing their confused looks, she explained further, "Basically a person who doesn't experience romantic attraction often.

"I just don't want you guys to be angry with me. You three are already in love with me, but I have never been in love before. It's just going to be a long time to fall in love - _if I do_." She added the last part quietly.

It was true. She didn't know anyone with experience she had. She left out her sexuality. She wasn't ready to admit that side of her yet. She felt more comfortable with her romantic preference than anything else.

"We waited thousands of years my dear… As long you're by our side. We don't care how long it'll take to receive your love," Marcus said.

Carmen smiled at them. She almost felt comfortable here, but she wished there was someone who looked like her. It wasn't like she hated white people, but some of their tormenting things they did to her, scarred her for life.

**Miss me? Last week, I didn't get home till after 8 and honestly it sucked. I had to eat do homework/things I need to do and go to bed so there wasn't writing time. There was a complete other part to this, but I felt like this would be a good ending to the chapter, and the next one would be more entertaining. **

**Carmen will be in a relationship. Don't assume she is straight just because she does have sex, and fall in love with them eventually. I wanted to create an a-spec character because there are not enough of them, and I wanted to see myself in a fic where we find someone, but the queerness doesn't go away. **

**I think I did like an hour worth of research about graymantic; frankly, since I had to search up if gray-aro fell in love. I'm graymantic and have never fallen in love with someone so that's why I had to check.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks to hermonine, silverwinterwhite, seraphina987 and maalani for reviewing! Thanks for your input Maalani; it's mainly because I have found that most doctors I've seen are crazy and not helpful. **

**I have never realized this until now, but it's really important to address in later chapters especially. When Carmen is getting upset over little things and that, do not ever say "You're overreacting. It's nothing." Carmen has social anxiety (so do I) and addresses that to others- it's something that happens when you have anxiety. **

**I apologize for this taking so long, but stuff happened. School drove me crazy and endless appointments. First, Dentist (fine till wisdom teeth came about), then a doctor appointment (which I'm not crazy, but hey look-no help from them), than another dentist appointment. From the x rays, my bottom wisdom teeth are impacted and my left side is touching my molar. Funny thing is, I can't feel anything. From what I've heard, the earliest is sometime in April. **

**Chapter 14**

Carmen sat idly on the bed. She wondered if she was making a mistake, by giving them a little bit of her trust. A bit of trust that way, if they did hurt her-it wouldn't feel like her heart was shattered and wasn't picking up broken pieces after they hurt her.

They seemed sincere enough. The question still remained, will they be caring like her male friend back in high school or would they turn out to be her father? A lying monster that abused her for everything.

The day her mom left, was the day everything turned gray. Her mom was the only Korean person in her life, but she never talked about her culture or her family. The only thing she knew was that her mom came to America, quickly met her dad after a few months and had her.

It was fine. Her mom always had what was considered "normal" food. There was no seafood, rice or any Korean dishes at her house. The other children asked her questions, and mocked her, because she wasn't acting like a stereotypical Asian.

Carmen didn't bring rice to school, or what they considered. She acted like one of the bring white kids, but her Asianess stood out. She didn't have their features. She was good at math, but science was practically a foreign concept to her.

But now. She was stuck deciding on whether to trust them. Though, there was one thing that still blew her away. The fact that they were no longer figments of her imagination, but very _real people. _

Carmen always believed in the supernatural- after having those dreams when she was little when her father was abusing her. She'd nearly forgotten about them. After nearly a decade of trying to live with her scars.

Scars that made everything harder for her to do something. Trauma that she couldn't even heal from. It was so fucking impossible, that she was pretty sure every doctor she'd seen would tell her the same thing.

Carmen stood up from the bed, and walked out of the room. She was grateful that they left her alone to gather her thoughts.

"Um-Do you know if the Cullens are still here?" She asked the guard that was stationed right out hee door. He looked familiar-Felix if she remembered correctly.

"They're waiting down below. Shall I take you to them, my lady?" He asked.

Carmen nodded and followed Felix. It was only not even a ten minute walk, but she soon found a familiar tiny pixie with the same looking bronze eyes as Edward.

Bella was huddling near Edward, still shaking with fright. Edward glanced at her and stared at her. Carmen had to fight the urge to not look at the floor even though it was a challenge. Fuck looking people in the eyes.

"Alice, why didn't you tell me?" Carmen said.

Alice looked up at her before responding,

"I thought it would have been better. You saw what happened when _they _found out about Bella. It was better to keep you quiet about us and you didn't seem to want to be with us."

"Did you see me with them? Is that why you were so persistent about me coming back to Forks, and going with you to here?"

"I thought it wouldn't turn you into a soulless monster! I didn't see the way it turned out. My visions are limited if you haven't noticed. Besides, you were the only thing that would have kept us all alive"

"But you fucking lied to me. You didn't see the wreckage that you made in my life. I lost my friend from a car accident, and lost you. I trusted you."

"Carmen, I'm sorry. It was the only choice. Edward was pretty instant since we haven't aged and people were starting to notice."

"Why cut me off?"

"I thought it would be better. Edward, did the same thing. To keep you both intact."

"I understand." Carmen turned away, before approaching Edward.

"Are you _fucking_ kidding me? You decided to kill yourself, nearly get all of us killed and dragged me into this world. And decided to make the Cullens leave. Alice has been my friend and the absence hurt for a little while. That's pathetic."

Edward opened his mouth, but closed it. Probably wise.

"You should have died," Carmen murmured to herself-referring to Edward. She felt a little better, but she was confused as fuck.

…

Carmen crawled into bed after eating some delicious lasagna. It tasted so damn good, especially with the cheese that was just right and they even gave her some pink lemonade!

She was about to turn over and stare at the wall for hours before her phone rang.

"Hello?

"Is Miss Willis there?" The voice said.

"This is her?" She didn't mean for the answer to sound like a question.

"I'm calling you to say that Miss Zhang woken up from her coma of a car accident back in August of 2006."

"Really?" Relief flooded through her and she was completely happy.

"She would be discharged soon. It seemed that she made a quick recovery, but still struggles with stuff. She will be discharged within a week or so."

"Okay thank you," She replied. She hung up the phone and she smiled. She'd finally get to see Lila again! But first, how the hell would she ask them to let her leave, they seemed content on her staying. Though, she still had a lot of stuff to do before she could even settle down in Italy.

* * *

**Well Lila finally waken up. I'm so excited to get back to writing again and see how this story devolops. I'm promise the kings will be in the next one, I'm pretty sure that you're all excited to see them in general. **

**Drop a review down below (and the next one will be out really soon)! **


	15. Chapter 15

**Thanks to maalani for reviewing! I had this dream where I somehow wrote this chapter and there was this one scene between Lila and Carmen, then I realized oh wait, that was the** **wrong chapter, because I haven't got there. Also how are we even on chapter 15, it's so surreal. Kinda hiding myself in a cave, because I take forever on updates now. I'm not going to promise quicker updates, but I can promise you this-I'll never abandon my stories. **

**Chapter 15**

Carmen stared at the ceiling for what it seemed to be eternity, which was probably ten minutes at most. She'd been thinking about what to say to them especially as it seemed that they cared about her, but she had a lot of stuff to do before she could actually move to Italy permanently.

Right now, she'd been stuck on words. She was never the greatest at talking especially when it came to talking to people. It was like her mind always shut off, and her answers were very awkward. Carmen noticed that in high school when she tried asking questions, and of course, her lovely Sophomore year, which really wasn't that lovely.

She never really liked dealing with her lousy gym teachers who bullied her relentlessly because she wasn't athletic enough, and she was self-conscious about the scars that littered her body. Those shorts and baggy shirts did nothing to hide the abuse, and self-harm scars and made her feel even worse especially when changing in the locker room when she didn't get lucky to get a stall or a shower curtain. It was also even worse when it came with her English teacher and counselors who decided to be a bitch to her especially when they found out about her self-harm scars.

She let out a shudder when she remembered what her father did to her that night. Needless to say, that was the last time she trusted authority. Staying the distance, making sure her arms and legs were always covered up even in the spring/summer heat. It was better keeping it in than actually telling people.

Carmen rolled over on her side and looked at the clock _11: 30 PM_. Ugh, it looked like there was no sign of her going to sleep anytime soon and frankly; no matter how much the room looked nice, she still didn't feel safe. It was probably her fear of the dark that scared her the most more than anything. Even years of trying to heal, her mind still hadn't moved past that.

Sighing, Carmen grabbed her phone and looked at it. Her fingers went to her contact list, and she found the name she was looking for, but she exited out quickly. The person already did too much damage to her already. There was no one else in her contact that was highly important, so she put her phone down and got up from the bed.

Carmen grabbed her tennis shoes and exited out the room. Not really bothering to even care where she was going, she just headed into a random direction.

Eventually, she ended up at the Gardens and she sat there on the grass. She looked up at the night sky and it was peaceful. She hadn't really seen a lot of peaceful nights like this especially seeing a lot of stars like this. It was quite beautiful and took her mind off of this. She hugged her knees while she was in deep thought.

Carmen didn't realize she was crying until she felt tears dripping down her face. She felt the presence of cold hands embracing her, which terrified her more. She immediately started to squirm in the person's grip, more of an instinct than anything at this point. Carmen simply didn't really liked to be touched especially by a male's hand, but if it was someone else-there was a limit on how far that'd go

"Carissima, why are you crying?" She heard a male voice that sounded familiar. She couldn't place it, until she looked up and saw a pale blonde. _Caius._

"I'm fine," Carmen murmured. It was a lie that rolled off her tongue, mostly because she didn't want to tell them. She just met them for goodness sakes! She wanted to, but she was scared that they were going to abandon her for opening up. It always happened eventually.

"You're crying," Another voice piped up-Aro said, sitting near her. He refrained from touching her which was probably really grateful considering her _dislike of being touched_. It wasn't her fault, but she knew the reason why. It was due to her _fucking trauma she had that caused her like this. _

"Like I said, it's nothing," Carmen snapped. _Just my stupid emotions getting the better of me. _She thought of, quickly wiping off the tears that were on her face, to hide any proof that she was hurting inside. It was an instant reaction-_don't let anyone know that they hurt you. It's better to remain strong than look weak._

"We're not going to push you, il mio amore-but we need to know what's bothering you so we can help," Marcus said reassuringly.

Carmen let out a small smile at that, before she said in a soft tone, "It's just trauma I have. It's nothing, really."

It was true-even trying to heal from it was hard especially when it came from escaping her past. Those memories just constantly invaded her mind, and made her feel worthless and unwanted most of the time. She just wanted a break from it. A day where she wasn't constantly reminded about who she was physically.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Aro inquired, care lacing his tone.

"No...I can't, it's too painful." That was true. Her trauma was for her to know only. She didn't want people to push it, and fucking inquire about it when it brought up unwanted memories. Even therapy couldn't help that because it felt really violating quite a bit afterwards. It was probably the reason why after she moved to Jacksonville again, she stopped going to therapy. She was more miserable than anything and saved her a lot of money.

Carmen was tired of people always trying to get her to talk about it, but in return, they always told it to someone else-making her feel like a freak afterwards. They never seemed to care about how she would feel afterwards, how much suffering she would be in-and how to hide the pain-_the scars_ when trying to pick out clothes to hide the abuse.

"We understand. We're not going to push you until you're ready to tell us about it," Marcus said.

"Thank you," She spoke softly. She knew they were not going to leave her as being their mate, and they seemed trustworthy. She only hoped in one day, she could return the favor. She knew they cared about her, and wasn't going to betray her trust-but there was still a part of her that was weary. Weary about how far this would go, but that was probably her anxiety that was talking to her.

Carmen sat there deep in thought, still aware that they were still sitting next to her in silence. She spoke with worry in her voice, and she probably stuttered quite a bit, "I need to return back home to get my life in order."

**I don't know why, but I really liked the picture of the volturi kings with Carmen sitting outside in the dark, looking at stars kinda cute. This went in a different direction than I thought it would, but here we are. Life took a toll on me quite a bit when it came to school, family and of course, wisdom teeth. I got 2/4 removed and wasn't so bad. Also, writer's block. Drop a review down below and tell me what you think! It's passed 1 am and I'm going to sleep. **


	16. Chapter 16

**I apologize for the span of updates I'll be putting out within a couple of days, to make it up for my hiatuses and I'm on summer break, so I kinda want to get somewhere before school starts again. **

**Chapter 16**

Carmen held her breath, as she waited for the three kings to process what she said. She was terrified of what they were going to say-probably that she was crazy. Nothing bad was going to happen? She knew it was her anxiety talking that made her feel this way.

The disease that encroached into her brain, making her think that she was crazy. She should have seen how much her life was ruined before it was too late to where it controlled her life, every passing minute. Until, it felt like she was drowning and letting the voice in her head control her body and actions. Letting the voice waste all these years until she just had enough.

Carmen was sick of the voice. She knew the only way to even silence the voice was to take _control_ of her life. Be the own independent woman she knew she was, stop letting fear control her. Stop letting people walk over before she gets hurt. Carmen knew she couldn't change overnight, but maybe-she can start by asking questions even if they sounded stupid in her head.

"Cara mia?" Aro asked, "Are you listening to what I said?"

Aro's voice snapped her out of her thoughts. Carmen looked at him, before saying, "Sorry, what did you say?"

"Is this about your friend Lila?" He repeated.

Carmen flinched. Even though she knew that her friend was awake back in Forks; it just made her feel worse. Lila's been in a coma for ages and she just now got her life together and those memories of the car accident flooded her mind. She squeezed her eyes shut and her breathing became laboured, as memories overtook her mind.

_Blood. _

_So much blood. They must have hit an animal, car or a tree or something. Lila was an excellent driver while Carmen avoided driving as it felt scary being behind the wheel. There was something about it that terrified her the most, but she was willing to drive if need be. _

"_Lila," She croaked softly, moving her head slowly and looked at her unconscious friend who looked pretty much dead from what she could tell. _

_Carmen was vaguely aware of the pressure on her head. Paying no attention to something wet dripping, or the glass that was on her, she stood up a little and reached across to Lila's neck. Hoping to find a pulse. _

_She sighed in relief as her fingers felt a slow pulse, and sat back down in her seat. She had no strength in getting out or getting help, so she sat there before her vision blackened again and lost consciousness again. _

Carmen let out a sigh as soon as the memories stopped replaying in her head. She couldn't remember too much from the accident, as her brain probably locked it away to where she couldn't remember it. It was like the abuse she suffered as a teen and kid, but some memories just escaped into her consciousness.

She looked up and saw the worried glances on her mates. And replied softly, "Yeah, it's about my friend." She looked away before explaining, "I just got a call from Forks Hospital saying she was finally awake. Lila is my best friend, and I can't cut her out of my life. She helped me when I needed her the most."

"She's your soul sibling," Marcus stated.

Carmen piqued up from that and a smile graced her features before she responded, "Her dad always said that. I always thought it was because we were always together, close like siblings. Her family helped raise me after they realized about the bruises and how often I flinched at every touch."

"Bruises?" Caius questioned.

_Shit. I said too much. Me and my damn mouth. _Carmen's mind raced to find an excuse so that they didn't get too suspicious or leave her after she told them the truth. No one liked victims of any types of abuse-thinking they're too problematic or they couldn't handle the trauma. She already told them about her being on the ace and aro spectrum, though abuse and being queer was two different things.

"I fell quite a bit as a child," Carmen lied, relieved that the lie rolled off her tongue easily. No one needed to know about her past.

"Her father physically and sexually abused her," Aro said.

Carmen stood up suddenly. Her dark brown eyes widened at them. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it before a thought came to her mind. She didn't want to have this sort of discussion-at least not now. She ran away, feeling hurt with every step.

She didn't want anyone to know about that. It was her past that she tried every day to run away. Some days succeeding, but when memories slipped into her mind-those days were hard. As she somehow made it back into her room, she curled up on her bed and started to cry.

The abuse still felt so fresh despite it being years old, and she still wasn't comfortable with talking about it. She couldn't really bring it up to people without the judging. A couple of thoughts occurred to her as she cried herself to sleep.

_One: How did Aro know about her past? _

_And two: Was she a coward for running away since she couldn't bear talking about it?_

…

Aro, Caius and Marcus sat around their mate after hearing her cry. They knew it was worrying that she was out in the gardens in the middle of the night, but it was quite late for the little human. It sounded like she was hurt, and confused about something. Their undead hearts broke as they heard her.

Carmen talked about some of the stuff, until it got a little concerning. They saw her visibility flinched at the mention of her old friend, Lila. It seemed to be a fresh wound, and Aro knew what happened that day, but it still pained him when she explained. HIs little mate was heartbroken!

She lreplied softly, "Yeah, it's about my friend." She looked away before explaining, "I just got a call from Forks Hospital saying she was finally awake. Lila is my best friend, and I can't cut her out of my life. She helped me when I needed her the most."

"She's your soul sibling," Marcus stated.

A soft smile was on her face before she explained further, elaborating how close she and Lila truly was, "Her dad always said that. I always thought it was because we were always together, close like siblings. Her family helped raise me after they realized about the bruises and how often I flinched at every touch."

"Bruises?" Caius questioned, interrupting her.

They saw how panicked their mate looked at the mention of it, and knew they were treading on shallow water. One wrong move would chase her away, and they waited for her response.

"I fell quite a bit as a child," Carmen told them. They could tell it wasn't the truth that she was telling them, and there was something much darker than what she was telling them.

"Her father physically and sexually abused her," Aro interrupted, and regretted it as soon as his mate jumped up and ran from them as if they were a monster.

Caius turned to him. His bright crimson eyes darken before he snarled, "Did you forget to tell us something, brother? Because of you, our mate ran from us."

And so Aro told them the story and what he saw through the hand contact. He told them about how Carmen was physically and sexually abused as a child to where Lila was her best friend, and the only place where she felt safe. That she was still struggling with her anxiety, and her PTSD about her abuse was a child.

By the end, all they felt was anger for the man who taught their mate-nothing but pain and horror. It was all because her father couldn't handle the leaving of his wife, Carmen's mother, who left them. But inflicting that kind of damage on someone so young pained them. He was probably lucky that he was rotting in jail, but they love to torutre her father, for cueing the pain to their mate.

Aro, Caius and Marcus heard her crying in her room, for what it seemed to be a while as they went back to the library.

"What do we do?" Caius questioned. The normally angry king felt his undead heart break inside, and felt weak as his mate continued to cry in her room.

"Best to leave her alone. Let her sort out her feelings before trying to talk to her," Marcus suggested, returning to another book.

"Marcus is right, brother. As much as it pains me to say, it'd be best to leave her alone as we don't want to push our mate too far, or risk losing her," Aro said.

...

Carmen slept with nightmares plaguing her every few hours. No matter where she went, it seemed like her trauma followed and so did her nightmares. It was hard, but she was used to it. Carmen yawned, and rubbed at her eyes. She swallowed, and noticed the lack of parchness that was usually there.

At least, she didn't end up screaming hopefully through any of it. It wouldn't do well for vampires to hear her scream, and cry about her nightmares. That would be quite mortifying. She looked around the room, relieved that the three kings weren't watching her sleep and stared at her while she slept, like a creepy stalker.

Events from last night rushed to her, and she was mad at herself for overreacting, but most importantly, she hated the fact that they intruded with her own trauma. Carmen wasn't going to get flashbacks from those events or feel violated that she had to explain her own trauma to them.

She rolled over on her side, and reached over to the nightstand to grab her phone. She winced as she knew that she forgot to charge it, but at least it was 46%, but had plenty of battery power-enough to make a phone call.

She scrolled to a name that made her stop. Carmen stared at it, knowing it was a bad idea especially as she told herself she was never going to call them after they literally ghosted her for months at a time. Her finger pressed down on the contact and let the phone ring.

After the second ring, the other voice on the end picked up and spoke before Carmen even had a chance to say 'hello'.

"Hey, Carmen!" the bubbly voice of Alice came through on the other side. "I saw your fight with the kings, and I'm surprised they didn't tell you."

"Tell me what?" Carmen questioned.

"Do you know how some of us have abilities? Edward can read minds, while I could see the future. Marcus can see people's bonds, and Aro can read every thought, memory, et cetera by contact."

Carme felt her heart drop. How could they withhold that from her. God, she was so stupid! She was starting to trust them a little bit, but oh my god-if Aro knew her past. He would no doubt tell the other two about her past. They'd probably fucking pity her, or treat like she was some broken person. That was what everyone else did.

"Shit…" Carmen trailed off before she whispered into her phone, "I know this sounds so stupid, but can you please get me out of here."

"I'll help you. Jasper and I are currently in London, but we'll help you."

"Thank you."

Carmen knew she was being unreasonable-but now, she had to get out. She was probably being selfish because she needed time, and right now, she wanted to get things prioritized first before even thinking about her mates.

…

**This is a pretty lengthy chapter, but there was stuff I wanted to cover before I ended it because Lila will be returning in the next chapter or 2! I'm so excited, but also this stuff just happened. I didn't even know it was going to happen like this, but it did. I just realized I got this chapter out within a week, so we're going back to weekly chapters! Leave a review, and tell me what you think!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Thanks to popularcypher and hermonine for reviewing! At least this didn't take a month? Also, this chapter did not want to be written at all which is mainly the reason why it hasn't even got an update. **

**Chapter 17**

Carmen grabbed her small bag that she brought with her. She took out her anxiety meds, grabbed two identical, white pills before popping them in her mouth. She took a sip of water from the glass she asked the guards, and felt the effects of the medication instantly. She was grateful that her dose was finally working properly and helped her, but there were days-where it felt like it wasn't manageable and it was hard.

Fortunately, today wasn't one of those days and she was free from her mind. Carmen sighed and grabbed her phone out of habit. She saw a text from Alice saying that she was at a nearby cafe, about a five minute walk from the clocktower.

That was a relief. At least it wasn't too far, and from the directions that Alice sent wasn't that complicated. She did not want to ask any locals for directions due to the language barrier.

Carmen stood up, swallowing any doubt that lingered in her head before she headed out of her room. Passing the guards that were stationed at her door, she asked a quick question.

"Where are the kings at?"

"They're in the library… I could take you there, my queen, if you wish," The tall guy-Felix if she remembered correctly.

"Thank you," Carmen murmured. "Err, what's your name?"

"Felix, my queen," He said, motioning her to follow. She sighed in relief, she was glad that she remembered his name correctly. She always had a weakness when it came to her names. Names always seemed to escape her, unless she memorized them by appearance or she knew them for a while.

Soon, they arrived at the library. Felix pushed the door opened and she walked in. She froze as soon as she saw all three of them. Marcus was reading a book and looked disinterested, while Aro and Caius looked like they were in a heated match of chess.

They both looked up at the same time as soon as she approached.

"Erm, hi," Carmen said weakly. Aro instantly approached her, and his red eyes were filled with pain as he stood there in front of her.

"I'm sorry, il mio amore… I didn't realize how much pain that would cause you," He murmured.

Carmen blinked. She was not expecting that at all, not after what happened last night. Her mind raced as she tried to think of something to say. She almost wanted to forgive him, but honestly there was no way she was going to do that. She trusted too many people, and they all betrayed her.

Besides, she barely even knew him. Carmen wasn't going to forgive them right away. Just because they say, she was their mate; that didn't mean that was going to fall head over heels for them quickly.

"It's fine… No one really seems to care when they hurt me in one way or another," Carmen said bluntly.

"Still, mia cara, we really shouldn't have pressed on with the matter," Aro said, sorrow filling his voice.

This time, it was Caius who spoke, "No one should take advantage of you like that, or hurt you like that."

Carmen blinked. Perhaps, she was being too sensitive or maybe she just wasn't used to people in general especially guys. Or maybe she just couldn't handle this since everything happened too quickly. She spun on her heel, and ran out.

…

The cafe was right where Alice said it was. It wasn't too hard to find. She didn't know how she managed to get out of the castle, but she wasn't worried about that. Right now, all she wanted to do is get out of this stupid town and try and figure things out.

Carmen approached them. She made sure to keep her stoic facade up, and made sure that nothing looked wrong. The last thing she really needed was people asking questions and making things worse.

"Thank god you're here," Carmen murmured, once she sat down across from them. She noticed Alice looking concerned, and Jasper also giving the same expression. Whatever she may have been feeling was gone, and she knew that was porbably jasper trying to calm her down, which she never really noticed.

"I saw your fight… What happened?" Alice inquired.

"Being too insensitive," Carmen shrugged. "After last night, I just can't deal with them. I need to leave this place."

"You do realize, this is not going to end well for either?" Jasper said. "When mates are separated, they often go through effects away from missing their presence. Physical effects will happen almost immediately… Rejecting the bond is worse."

"What happens?" Carmen piqued up, curious. She never really heard too much things about being a mate or whatever.

"It kills the other person, or in your case, the kings when you reject. They often perish, and because you're human-it's unlikely you'll notice, but you'll feel the emptiness."

"Oh." Carmen's mouth turned into an O, before she said, "Well, I'm not rejecting the bond or whatever. I just need to clear my head, and get my life organized before I can even procross to even understand what happened."

"Better warn you, before you fully reject it," Jasper added.

"Thank you… I appreciate it," Carmen said. "What time are we leaving?"

"We have a flight scheduled in a couple of hours… We've figured we'd let you get some rest before we get on our flight."

Carmen nodded. She stood up from the table and went to the counter to order a latte. All she wanted was caffeine in her system, and just needed something to relax her. It helped her, and made her body function more, and plus-she was past due for caffeine in her system.

She got lucky that the cashier understood her English, and she got her latte. Taking a sip, she smiled softly as the sweetness and the sugar met her taste buds.

…

Carmen plugged in her headphones, and listened to 'Nobody's Home' by Avril Lavigne as she waited for the plane to take off. It was nearing the late afternoon already as it took Alice and her crazy driving skills, a little over an hour-mostly due to the airport traffic.

She hated Alice's driving. She really hoped that vampires didn't drive this _recklessly, _because she really didn't like feeling that she could die in any minute. But ever since they hit Rome, the emptiness in her soul grew and it was so strange, to feel the hollowness. _The emptiness. _

Even after living a life without much emotions, theis new experience was quite new to her. It just felt odd, but she wasn't going to say anything. She had to get out of town-clear her head.

She took a deep breath to help relax her, and just let the music take hold of her.

_Be strong, be strong now_

_Too many, too many problems_

_Don't know where she belongs_

_Where she belongs_

Avril Lavigne's voice came through for one last time, before she got sick of the music. She loved listening to songs on repeat, but she'd been playing this song for what it seemed like for a month.

Carmen let herself relax, and let her eyes droop, and before she knew it, she fell asleep. The day's worth finally caught up to her and last night's events transpired.

Hours later, Carmen woke up with a start when Alice softly shook her awake. She yawned groggily, grabbing her carry-on and managed to walk straightly out of the airplane and into the tar-mac.

She didn't know, nor did she care where Alice got the car, or maybe it was hers-but she was too tired. It was the middle of the night, and as soon as she bucked in her seatbelt. She leaned her head against the window and watched the blurry surrounding for a few minutes before sleep caught up with her.

Carmen didn't know how long the car ride was, but the next thing she knew-she was walking up to Lila's porch, and she unlocked the door with her keys. She let out a yawn, and waved goodbye to Alice and Jasper. She was a little tired, but with the sleep she had-it would help her last for the few hours.

It was near 6:15, by the time she looked at the clock. She made herself a coffee, before sitting down on the couch and turning on the TV. It was really dusty-mostly due to the fact that she hadn't been here in months, and no one to take care of it.

She had less than an hour before visiting hours. She switched through channels, praying there was something good before she eventually settled on Disney channel, playing something unfamiliar to her.

2 twenty TV shows later, Carmen let out another yawn before she locked the door behind her, heading to the hospital. The rian gently poured on the ground-luckily it wasn't raining hard nor was it hailing as she hated those two types of rains. She started the car, feeling the gentle hum of the engine beneath her before she headed to the hospital.

It was a blur, but she eventually got to Lila's room and almost wanted to collapse onto her knees and cry. After so long, she saw her friend sitting up, and talking to one of the nurses. She prayed so hard to even her friend's voice again, and now that moment came.

She knocked on the door, and Lila's wide brown eyes looked at her. She burst into a smile, and Carmen couldn't help, but smile as she approached her.

"Hey!" the same bubbly voice of Lila exclaimed. She gave her a huge hug, as soon Carmen moved a chair closer to the bed.

* * *

**Took a while, right? ****I'm going to try and get somewhere with updates, but school is starting in exactly 3 weeks or so, and I have a hybrid schedule. I'm a little worried with school, but I won't know more until orientation about this. I hope everyone is safe, and trying to stay sane! Anyways, drop a review down below and tell me what you think!**


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